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"So, your father promised he'd help Franco save some face. God knows, we need that after they've dirtied our name through the mud…"
She didn't get to finish her sentence, though, as she lost her balance, her hand shooting out as she caught Raf's arm.
"Mom?" he asked on a whisper.
"I'm ok, darling. Just a little spell," she strained a smile.
But it wasn't just a little spell. Not with how she was behaving, breathing harshly, getting tired every few minutes and needing to sit down.
"You'll come with us, right? To the banquet? We need to show a strong front. Especially in times like this. Beni even convinced that good for nothing of your brother to come," she grumbled under her breath.
Raf wasn't sure he was up to face his brother, not so soon after he'd taken such a powerful hit to his heart. Yet he was also worried about his mother. She didn't seem well. So, to please her, he nodded his assent, promising to join the family for the banquet at the end of the week.
Unbeknownst to him, Benedicto and Cosima had another purpose in mind for the banquet. With the famiglia adding more and more pressure on Benedicto to choose an official heir, the majority of the influential men being on Michele's side rather than Raf's, Benedicto had decided to pull the big guns.
He would use the banquet as an opportunity to show how volatile Michele was while also paving the way for an alliance for his son.
The only way Raf would be accepted as the heir would be if he brought something to the table, and a marriage to a girl from another well-regarded Italian family might just be what they needed. And the banquet was just the way to pave such a connection.
As the time for the banquet arrived, Raf tried his best to stay under the radar. His brother's presence was wreaking havoc on his peace of mind, and instinctively he tried to put himself into a worse light, making himself smaller, more insignificant.
Especially as Michele, as inebriated as always, yelled for everyone to hear what a retard he was.
Though the evening passed without incident, Raf could see that his parents planned something, especially when they approached Marcello Lastra with an offer to merge their two families.
One of his sisters had decided monastic life wasn't for her and she'd returned to civilian life. The downside was that in Benedicto's eyes, her past made her the perfect candidate.
He saw her as meek and biddable—traditional. Exactly what he needed to put Raf ahead in the running for the family legacy.
Raf, on his part, did his best to dissuade his parents from it. But it all came crashing down a few days after the banquet, when Cosima's little spell turned into a trip to the hospital.
The entire situation was grim, especially as the doctor suggested she had an onset of diabetes, likely caused by high stress.
Raf was shocked.
His mother tried to be cheerful about it, saying it was all going to be alright. Yet for Raf it was the last blow he needed at that moment.
If there was something he hadn't blamed himself until that moment, it had been his mother's health. And as he heard the dire news, he couldn't help but feel as if he'd contributed to it—that he'd been the source of that stress and the reason she was now in the hospital, getting ready to make life-altering changes for her health.
Maybe he'd realized it before, but at that point it was the first time Raf realized his self-harm tendencies were not, in fact, only directed at himself. They were making ravages all around himself, affecting every person around him.
And he wasn't sure he liked that.
"Will you do something for me, darling?" Cosima asked him a few days later, back at home. She was still weak and prone to some fainting spells, and he faithfully stayed by her side, not wanting to cause her more stress.
“W-what?"
"Will you at least meet the girl? You don't have to marry her if you don't like her. But will you? For me?"
Her features were grim, her slight body huddled against him as she released a weary sigh.
He was quiet for a moment, warring with himself. He wanted no part in their plans, yet at the same time, what could go wrong in one meeting? He would satisfy his mother and maybe then she'd stop pestering him about marriage meetings.
“F-Fine."
Not two days later and the first meeting was set. After all, the devil worked fast, but Cosima worked faster.
And so, they found themselves at the Lastra home, where Raf had the unexpected pleasure of meeting Assisi—or just Sisi.
