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“It’s okay,” I whisper, rubbing his back. “It’s going to be okay.”
I hold him a long while, until his shuddering becomes trembling, and finally he’s just rocking back and forth, me all but in his lap.
And all I can say is, “Shhh, it’s gonna be okay,” and squeeze him as tight as possible, but that seems to be enough.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
KHARON
She does not let go of me all night long. She discovered my darkest secret, and still, she clutched me to her and did not look at me as if I were a monster.
I hold her as I see the dawn break overhead.
My eyes close, as if I can call back the night. Because dawn means we must leave. And yes, this place was once home to nightmares, but she has made it. . . my rebirthing.
Because of her, I feel new. I will leave with a new name, as a new man. She looked into the face of my worst shame and embraced me with gentleness and understanding.
I am split open down my center. I do not know who I will be now. Except hers. Even if she will only have me for the length of her revenge, I will serve her with devotion.
My eyes squeeze shut and I try to pretend the sun hasn’t risen. Just a little longer in this dream, her fast asleep in my arms. Just a little longer.
But only for the space of a few more breaths because being hers means I cannot be selfish. She wanted to wake with the dawn.
My rage at my father for what he did to my brother is old, and Abaddon took vengeance for me. But hers is fresh, and justice remains to be seen. Still, I remember the fury of knowing how it burns in the chest. I would give her the same comfort she offered me last night.
Ever so gently, I brush the hair back from her forehead. Her eyes immediately blink open as her breathing changes.
“Is it morning?” she asks, alert so quickly. She has a soldier’s training. How did I not notice before? She may not be a soldier in the traditional sense, but she has been a fighter all her life.
I nod. “Dawn has just broken.”
She jerks to a sitting position, pulling out of the cocoon of my arms, then she’s a blur of motion as she gets dressed. There’s nothing else to do but pack everything up, one eye always on her as I say goodbye to our winter sanctuary.
She’s ready to go within five minutes; there’s no reason to linger. I sling the pack on my back.
I hold out my arms. “Climb onto my front and hold on tightly.”
She frowns a little as she glances at the high window but then comes towards me and throws her arms around my neck. With my bottom pair of arms, I heft her thighs around my waist and secure her to me tightly with my other two sets, then I crouch low and leap.
The jump is only a little more difficult with her attached to my front, especially since I have to let go of her with one pair of hands to grasp the window’s ledge, which makes her let out a little shriek, but we make it on the first try.
“Climb through,” I tell her as I hold on to the window, the bottom half of my body dangling over the chasm.
It takes her a second to unlatch her grip from around my neck, but, her breathing short, she finally manages to twist around in the narrow space of the window that barely fits my girth and pull herself up and out through. I heft myself up after her.
And then we are free, her sprawled on the snow and me crouched low. I hold out a hand to her. “Are you ready?”
She grabs my hand and pops back up to her feet.
I hold out all my arms. “Climb back on, and I will run us swiftly to the city.”
She makes a disgruntled face but then nods. “I’d say don’t run as fast as last time, but I guess that’s the point, huh?”
I smile at her. “Yes. Do not worry. I will hold tight.”
She wraps her arms around my neck again, and I revel in the close warmth of her body despite all her layers. “I’ll close my eyes. You tell me when it’s over.”
I chuckle and tuck her against me with two lower pairs of arms. I’ll need my upper pair to help me run. Again I wrap her thighs around my waist so her feet will not drag against the ground. At my top speed, we will be at the city in no time.
“If you want me to stop, knock me on the shoulder three times. Are you ready?” I ask.
“Yes,” she says, and then I take off like a rocket through the snow.
