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“You can ask me anything.” He took another drink of the liquor-spiked coffee because he knew he’d need it for whatever was about to come.
“Why haven’t you been with anyone since you left my mother?”
Fuck.
He’d cared for Gillian, and his obsession with her had consumed him. So, he’d been with no one else.
She’d been it for him, and he hadn’t even thought about any other woman.
But he sure as fuck wasn’t going to admit that.
“I just haven’t found anyone.” He could hear how deep his voice was, tried to keep his expression stoic, but he wondered where this was going.
If she tells me she’s seeing someone, I might fucking lose it.
Chapter
Seven
Why is this so damn hard?
As she stared at David, trying to muster up the courage to just tell him how she felt, the words lodged in her throat.
I love you. I’m in love with you. I’m too afraid of losing you to tell you the truth.
But his expression was stoic, no emotion showing on his face. He was like a fallen angel, his dark hair short, swept away from his forehead, his eyes light amber and hauntingly beautiful. He could have been the very devil himself, and she wouldn’t have cared. She would have loved him just as much.
Wake up. The world doesn’t always work the way I want it to. He used to be my stepfather, and now he’s just a friend. He feels an obligation to look over me after what I went through…after the past we share.
Those words played through her head and broke her heart all in the same breath.
Just push the feelings down. Move on from what I really want in order to keep David in my life.
His answer to her question hadn’t been very in depth, but then again, David didn’t overly share. He never had. David leaned forward, placed his forearms on his thighs, and stared at her right in the eyes. She’d seen this look from him before.
He was worried about her, and she couldn’t exactly blame him since she was being vague.
“Did someone hurt you?”
She shook her head right away. “No, no.”
“Someone bothering you? You know you can tell me, Gillian.”
She smoothed her palms over her thighs. “I know, but everything is fine.”
He looked like he didn’t believe her, so she quickly just brought up what she wanted to ask him. “I don’t have any real friends to talk to about anything, you know that.”
He nodded. “I’m always here for you.”
She smiled, but she was so damn nervous. “I want to date, but I feel like it’s not right, if that makes any sense.”
He didn’t speak. Didn’t even move for a long time. David finally leaned back in the chair, his legs parted slightly, his hands in tight fists on his thighs. She looked down at them, saw how tightly his hands were clenched, his knuckles white.
Looking up at his face, she saw his jaw was clenched and his eyes uncharacteristically hard.
His demeanor took her off guard because he looked…upset.
“Do you have someone in mind you’d want to see?”
She shook her head. “No, not really. I mean, I had an offer.”
It makes little sense because he has no clue what in the hell I’m going on about.
“If it doesn’t feel right, then it’s not right, Gillian.” His jaw was still clenched tight, his focus right on her.
She glanced down at her feet, not knowing how to even go on with this conversation. It felt weird, and although she was close to David, speaking about dating and other guys was strange, given the fact she was in love with him.
“Don’t you think it’s weird that I’m in my twenties and not in a relationship? That I haven’t been in one?”
“No,” he said instantly.
She was twisting her hands together, her heart beating so fast. “Maybe I’m defective—”
“There’s nothing wrong with you, Gillian, you understand?”
She nodded. But there is something wrong with me. I’m in love with you, David, but too much of a coward to tell you.
“Are you having issues with what happened?” David’s voice grew hard.
She shook her head. “No, not really. That’s not why I haven’t been with anyone.”
He didn’t move, didn’t respond.
“I think I just need to jump into something, just push how I feel away. I don’t want to be alone for the rest of my life.”
David didn’t speak, and if possible, she saw his body grow even tauter.
“I should probably let you get to bed. It’s late.” David was in front of her before she could say anything. Gillian rose and followed him to the front door. He paused there for a second, his body so big, so masculine.
He was nearing six and a half feet tall, and compared to her five-foot-six frame, which wasn’t that short, he towered over her. The shirt he wore didn’t hide how muscular he was. And his arms. God, his arms were so big, so hard and strong.
