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“Okay. So your dad was a client, and he walked away from her when she told him she was pregnant? That seems pretty rude.”
His lips curled up, and he smoothed back her hair. “I tell you my mom was a hooker and you call my dad rude. It doesn’t bother you?”
“You were right the first time. She’s a sex worker, and it’s necessary work,” she argued. “You should have figured out that I’m not a prude. There are men out there who have zero interest in a relationship, but they want sex. Isn’t it better for them to be honest than string along some woman who does want a relationship? And some people are lonely and can’t find what they need, so they buy it. There’s nothing wrong with it. We need human interaction like we need food and water. Sex is a need. It’s a complex need, something that should be easy and simple, but we’re human so we warp it.”
He leaned over and kissed her. She loved the way the man kissed. “You are a miracle, Tasha.” He sat back. “I’m glad you don’t find my background distasteful, but I assure you my father did. And my mom didn’t tell him. When she found out she was pregnant, she walked away because she knew he would want the baby if it was a boy, and he wouldn’t allow her to be in my life. So I had nine years with her. They weren’t all great, but I knew she loved me.”
“What happened?”
“She got sick,” he said quietly. “When she knew she was going to die, she called him. Did a DNA test. He still didn’t have any children. When she proved I was his child, she made a deal. In exchange for taking me, formally adopting me and giving me the Nash name, she could never see me again. I didn’t know she’d died until years later.”
Her heart ached with the sacrifice his mother had made. “She must have loved you very much.”
“I know that now. Years and experience have softened my memories of her, but at the time all I knew was she gave me away to a monster. My father sat me down and explained that I was his son now and I would do things the Nash way. He said the only thing my mother had done right was to give me the name Darren, so he didn’t have to change it. She did it on purpose, of course. She’d hoped he would accept me if I ever needed him if she followed the family naming conventions. My father would have taken any name she gave me, so I suppose it was a good thing. Anyway, I was to get the best grades, play the right sports, befriend the right people, and never, never be anything like my whore mother or there would be punishment.”
Tears pulsed at the back of her eyes. How terrible to go from a loving home to a cold one. It was something she could understand. “Dare, I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t be. I survived. It even got easier when it turned out I was good at school and not terrible at sports and my brother, Johnny, was born, and later my sister, Gina. My father wanted children, but he didn’t give a shit about any of us unless we weren’t living up to expectations. As long as we were good, we were left to nannies and our own devices. For a while I thought I might turn eighteen and get away. He thought he could control me through money. I didn’t care about money. I had a scholarship to study in Vancouver, and I was going to give my dad the finger and go live my life.”
“What leverage did he use?”
“My brother and sister.”
She should have known. It was exactly the way someone could manipulate her. “Asshole.”
“Yes, quite a bit of one. When I announced I was leaving, he explained that if I did, he would stop paying for Johnny’s tutors. He has dyslexia. He would put Johnny in a military school, and he would find a suitably rigid school for Gina. Couldn’t have her turning out to be anything like my mother. Johnny would die in military school, and Gina loved where she was.”
“So you stayed.”
“I went to the college he wanted me to go to, studied business and finance, and now I work for him.”
“You found the club when you were in college, didn’t you?” It would make sense. Despite her parents’ openness about sex, she hadn’t seen the inside of a working club until she was twenty, and then it had been one her father approved of, and she’d gone into training at The Club with her sisters. Cooper and Tristan had joined the year before.
“I was looking for one place where I had control, and I had a roommate who went regularly. I soaked it all in. I found a mentor. He was great. He talked me through a lot of my problems and taught me how to control my urges and to be patient. I was happy there for almost four years before my father found out, and well, I had to give up a lot for him to be willing to pay for my brother’s first rehab.”
