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I just buried my mom.
This is so fucked.
“Remy, I…”
His eyes dip to my lips and they part under the attention. I’ve never wanted to be kissed by someone as badly as I want to be right now. “You what?” he asks, eyes still fixated on my lips.
There're only inches between us now as we walk a line that shouldn’t be crossed. So close and yet so far. “I want to know.”
He groans, eyes clamping shut as if he’s trying to gain control. “You don’t, Ella. I know you think you do, but fuck… This is hard.”
“Stop resisting then,” I murmur.
His eyes fly open and a soft growl escapes his lips. And that’s when the car comes to a stop, snapping whatever spell had fallen over us. It’s as if a light switch flicks.
Remy turns stiff and removes his hand from my neck, shaking his head. “Shit. I don’t know what I was thinking. Sorry.” He runs a hand through his hair. “Forget what I said.”
I bite my bottom lip. “But—”
“Forget it, Ella,” he growls.
My chest clenches painfully as I don’t want him to return to the grumpy, broody stepdad he’s been since I met him. “Can’t we talk about—”
His hand wraps around my throat again and he squeezes, sending my heart rate spiking. “You’re playing with fire.”
I lick my lips. “Maybe I want to burn.”
His eyes flicker with a mix of desire and anger. “I won’t be the one to burn you.” He releases my throat and opens the car door, leaving me in the back.
A flood of guilt, grief, and disgust hit me simultaneously. I sit there for a few minutes until the driver clears his throat. “Apologies, miss, but I’ve got to get going.”
I shake my head. “Sorry,” I mutter, climbing out of the back of the car.
Mia rushes over to me the moment I step out. “There you are.” She pulls me into a hug I didn’t know I needed. “I’m so sorry.”
I hug her back tightly. “Thank you.”
“Don’t thank me. Come on, let’s get you inside.”
She laces her fingers with mine and drags me into the house. My grief is odd. It’s different from what I felt when Dad died. Mom and I never saw eye to eye. We couldn’t have been any different from each other.However, it doesn’t make what I feel toward her husband okay.
Remy was her husband, and we buried her today. I shouldn’t be disappointed that he didn’t kiss me. Although his words have just made everything more complicated.
I think about you the way no stepdad should ever think of his stepdaughter.
I hate myself for wishing that he’d just fuck propriety and give in to what he wants.
11
REMY
I’ve lost the plot.
I think about you the way no stepdad should ever think of his stepdaughter.
While I didn’t tell her I wanted to fuck her, I might as well have.
The question is, what the fuck came over me in the back of that car?
