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A knowing look enters his eyes, “You’re filled with guilt about your sister’s death. You think you could have prevented it if you were there. And now you’re trying to hang the guilt on Gio so you don’t have to blame yourself. You need to confront your feelings.”
“Feelings? I’m Stone, I don’t have any feelings or emotions, remember?” I scoff.
Edward frowns. “Surely, you’re not going to take your reputation to heart? Being Stone, the controlled one, the cool as ice man, who plays on ice is a myth that belongs in the rink. Off it, you’re human. A man who’s susceptible to making mistakes. A man who’s been beating himself up for being away when his sister needed him. A man who’s denying his love for his woman in the hope of punishing himself. You don’t want to commit to Gio because she is a living reminder of the fact your sister is dead. So you’ve decided you need to punish her as much as yourself.”
My heart slams against my ribcage with such force, I’m sure it’s going to break out of my chest. My pulse crashes against my temples. Sweat breaks out on my forehead, and my vision wavers.
Edward must notice my reaction, for he touches my shoulder.
I shake it off. “What gives you the right to analyze me, huh? What makes you think you have the answers to the challenges I’m facing?”
He lowers his arm to his side, and a bleak look comes into his eyes. “I don’t.” He looks away, then back at me. “But I’ve been where you are, and I stumbled. I lost the woman I loved, and my life has never been the same. I don’t want any of my friends to go through what I did. It’s why I’d rather risk pissing you off and telling you what you need to hear now than not.”
I scowl at him. He looks at me with a steady gaze—one in which there’s pain, but also determination.
"I’d tell you to piss off, but I know you have my best interests at heart,” I say slowly.
He nods. “I’m the General Manager of the team, but also your friend.
I never met your sister, but I’d wager, she wouldn’t be happy that you’re beating yourself—or anyone else—up over her choices. You’re stopping yourself from moving on with your life, and that’s doing you and the people around you—that includes your wife, your grandmother, and your team—a disservice."
My stomach heaves. Acid laces my throat. He’s right. There’s a ring of truth to his words I can’t deny. If only I could do the right thing moving forward.
"It pains me to admit it, but you’re right.”
“I am.” His lips curve slightly.
“Doesn’t negate the fact it’s fucking easy to be the one giving advice." I drag my fingers through my hair. "I can’t wait to return the favor."
He laughs. "A situation I’ll never find myself in. My path is set. There's no room for love."
I shake my head. "You’re right about perspective. It’s easy to spot the problem when you’re not caught up in it."
He seems taken aback, then slowly nods. "Which is why you know I’m right when I tell you to stop pissing about and confront the fact that your life is not your own anymore.”
66
Gio
Stonehole: Woman, you realize you’ve given away the equivalent of the economy of a third-world country to your favorite charities?
I read his message and allow myself a small smirk. I gave away close to a billion dollars, by my count. And yep, I settled for calling him by that name in my contact list. Bosshole or even Alphahole seemed too tame. Stonehole seems more apt. He is a stone, and I need him like I need a hole in the head. More like I need him to fill my holes, a-n-d, nope, not going there. I slow down my pace and message him back.
Me: Are you complaining?
Stonehole: I have no problem if you give away my entire fortune, all I ask is you spend some of it on yourself!
Me: I don’t need your money
To which he doesn’t respond. There isn’t even the jumping around of dots on the screen to tell me he was even contemplating a response. Typical Rick. It’s like he slammed that stone wall down, and now, I have no idea what he’s thinking.
"Was that him? What was his reaction to the card charges?” Mira pants as she tries to keep pace with Tiny, who’s walking fast enough to force us to trot to keep up with him. The big dog needs his exercise, so the two of us set off on a walk first thing in the morning. I reach for my bottle of water and take a swig.
"Not what I expected." I look up at her with a frown on my face.
"So he wasn’t angry?"
"He seemed to expect it. In fact, he almost seemed thrilled about the money I’ve spent." I bite the inside of my cheek. "His only question was why I haven’t spent any of the money on myself."
