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"I didn’t realize,” she murmurs.
Of course the name doesn’t mean anything to her. Why would it?
I look away. "Grams removed all pictures of her after her death. She doesn’t like to talk about her. She loved Diana more than her own daughter, my mother."
"What happened?" Her frown deepens.
I turn and lock my gaze with Gio’s. "She committed suicide."
"I’m so sorry." Gio slides her hands up to cup my face. "I truly am."
So am I, for what I’m going to have to do to you. But not tonight. Tonight, I’m going to forget what brought me here. How I’ve been playing you all along. How I’m going to hate myself for seeing through what I planned. How I have no choice if I want revenge for what happened. How… I’ve fallen for you without meaning to. How I’m damned, but I have to go through with this. I have to.
I turn my face into her palm and kiss the soft skin. Then sit back on my haunches. I hold out my hand, and when she places hers in mine, I tug. She straightens, and I release her hands, then reach for the camisole she’s wearing and tug it off. The creamy globes of her breasts tempt me to bury my head between them, but if I do, I won't stop. And I want to see her naked. Want her to see me naked. This time, I want us to be skin-on-skin, nothing in between. I reach for her panties, and when she raises her hips, I slide them down her thighs. She bends her knees, and I pull them off, then bring them to my face. I sniff, and she makes a noise at the back of her throat. "You’re filthy."
"You have no idea." I stuff the panties in the pocket of my jeans, then shove them down and aside. My cock springs free, and her gaze is instantly captured by it.
She stares at it, then swallows. "You’re so big."
I curl my lips, "I’m about to get bigger."
She scowls but doesn’t take her gaze off my dick.
I reach over her and toward the nightstand for a condom when she touches my shoulder.
"I’m on birth control."
"And I’m clean."
"I’ve never—" She presses her lips together.
"Never—?"
She glances away, then back at me. "Never been with anyone who hasn’t worn a condom before."
"And you won’t be with anyone else except me after this."
She jerks her chin in my direction, opens her mouth to ask a question a-n-d… I’m tired of trying to justify my actions, when all I do is trip up around her. I fit my lips to hers, position my cock at her opening, and in one smooth move, I thrust inside her.
She jerks, and a cry rolls up her throat, I swallow down the sound and freeze. My cock pulses inside her. So tight. So hot. All the muscles in my body lock. I release her mouth, and stare into her pain filled gaze.
"I’m going to fuck you now.”
45
Gio
I’m not a virgin. I've never been with a man before, but Ihaveused vibrators to get myself off. So, there’s no reason it should have hurt as much as it did when he penetrated me. But this is Rick. And his cock is bigger than my XXL-sized dildo. He’s too much, too huge, too everything inside me. I’m stretched around him, pinned down and unable to move. It’s a pleasure-pain that focuses my entire attention on that part of my body where we’re joined and sends a line of sensations zipping up my spine.
Then there are his filthy words? They are so over-the-top. I’ve read the heroes of my smutty novels talk dirty to their women, but coming from Rick, it’s more erotic, more primal, more raw. More real. Duh, of course, it's more real. But It's more than that. It's more him.
I hold his gaze, and the intent in his eyes is laced with lust and need, but there’s something more. Something I don’t dare identify. Something so intense, it brings tears to my eyes. I try to pull away, but he curls his fingers around the nape of my neck and stops me.
"Don’t be ashamed of how you feel.” His voice is soft, and so tender and there he is, the man under that ice-cold exterior, the man I’m falling for. The first man I’ve been with because I know, he’s the one.
And no way, am I going to explain that to him because who reaches the age of twenty-nine without being with a man? All of my experience comes from my smutty novels and my creative usage of my Steely-Dan. This is my secret, one I’ve never shared with any of my girlfriends. Because really, someone as confident as me, someone who loves power-dressing and is confident enough to make it in a cut-throat profession like PR… who’d guess I'd never had sex with a man? The thought crossed my mind when I met Dennis, but I was secretly happy when he didn't want to sleep with me until we got married.
On some level, I was relieved to find him cheating. It meant I didn’t have to sleep with him because, the truth is, I hadn’t been attracted to him that way. But he ticked so many boxes, assumed the problem was me. I simply wasn't interested in sex with a man. So, I opted to pour all of my energies into building my career instead.
