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All her life, she’d focused on controlling what she could and not worrying about the rest. Finding a life partner had been something that she’d had the false illusion she could control. She’d told herself it was a numbers game. If she met enough men, one of them would have to be ‘the one.’ The more dates she went on, the greater the probability she’d find her match.
But, after five years of being single, she was surrendering to the reality that she’d been wrong. It seemed all her friends and family were falling in love around her left, right, and center. Every woman except Kennedy, including all of her friends, sisters, and cousins, had fallen deeply in love with the man of their dreams. For so long, she’d held out hope that would be her fate as well, but it was time to face facts.
Her biological clock had been ticking since before she could talk. She’d always wanted a baby, and all her life she’d thought that having a family had to look a certain way. That she needed a partner to do it with.
But now she was finally ready to face the fact that it was just a dream. If she wanted a baby, she had complete control over that happening.
As much as she hated to admit it, Knox Savage had been the final nail in the coffin for her giving up on finding Mr. Right. For the past week, despite knowing he could only ever be Mr. Right-Now, she’d been waiting with bated breath to see him. Her mind had fixated on him and the limited experiences they’d shared together.
After he’d come to her rescue and saved Sofie from the tree, she was convinced they’d shared a moment. She’d been sure the next time she’d see him, he’d ask her out. He hadn’t.
When he walked her home from her date, she would have bet the pink slip to her car that he was going to kiss her. He hadn’t.
This past week, she’d been certain every time the bell rang over the door that he was stopping by to see her. He hadn’t.
What he had done was disappear. Even though they weren't, well, anything, she felt like she’d been ghosted. The first three days he was in town, every time she’d turned around, he was there. The past five, poof, vanished. Gone.
Even though she knew he wasn’t the right man for her, she couldn’t deny the chemistry they shared. This past five days, she’d spent so many hours wondering what, if anything, had transgressed between them. She’d wasted time and energy obsessing about a man who was completely wrong for her.
Her obsessiveness over someone with whom she had no future combined with the news from the doctor today had been the wake-up call she’d needed.
As she lotioned up her legs, she was tempted to call Kennedy and cancel tonight. Now that she’d made the executive decision, she had blinders on. All she wanted to do was focus on the next chapter of her life. Getting pregnant.
This was the beginning of the summer season, which was the busiest for business. She didn’t want to do anything until after the summer was over. Her plan was to use peak tourist season as a time to prepare, so in three months she could start the process of artificial insemination. When she got home from the fertility clinic today, she’d researched sperm banks, and she’d already made an appointment to visit one next week to browse possible donors.
Laura was so focused on the new chapter in her life, she jumped when her niece popped her head into the bathroom.
"Tia, can Bryce come over?"
"No, you know that you can’t have boys over when I’m not home."
"I’m sixteen!"
"Exactly." Laura grinned at her niece. "Listen, I won’t be out late. When I get home, Bryce can come over and watch a movie."
Her niece sighed in resignation. It obviously wasn’t the answer she wanted, but she accepted that it was the best she was going to get. "Thanks Tia."
Marissa texted on her phone as she left the room.
As Laura watched her go, she knew that when she had her own children, obviously her love for them would be immeasurable. But she just couldn’t imagine loving any person as much as she loved Marissa.
Not only was she the first of her nieces and nephews, but Lori had suffered from debilitating postpartum depression after she had Marissa. To help her sister, Laura moved in with her for the entire year before she got married to Mario.
Her brother-in-law was working full time and going to school, so Laura had been the one to get up at night with Marissa. She’d been the one to walk her up and down the halls when she was colicky and teething. She’d been there when she’d taken her first steps at eleven months, said her first word, which was banana, and was there for all her one-year milestones.
Laura had been young and naïve at the time and had assumed that she would be a mom by the age of twenty-five. Instead, she was getting divorced by twenty-five.
Life had definitely not gone how she’d planned it. But there was no reason to dwell on the past. It was time to take matters into her own hands. She’d go tonight and fulfill her bestie duty, and tomorrow her new life would begin. She was going to delete all her apps, stop putting herself out there, and put all of her energy into preparing to have a baby.
She went to the closet and reached for her jeans when she saw the bodycon dress that she’d bought from an Instagram ad that had surprisingly lived up to the hype. The dress was advertised to cling to all her curves in the right way, and it did. It was a red, scoop-neck, razor-back midi dress that hit her mid-calf and accentuated her hourglass figure.
She’d been saving it to wear on a special romantic occasion. The dress had been hanging in her closet for two years, and she still hadn’t worn it. And since her dating life was going to be put on ice for the time being, she wasn’t sure when she would have a chance to debut it.
If tonight was going to be her last night on the market, she might as well go out with a bang. Well, not an actual bang. She didn’t want to think about how long it had been since that had happened or, with her new plan, how long it would be until it happened again.
Sex was not her priority right now. Building the life she wanted was.
After wiggling into the garment, she grabbed her black heels with a slim strap that buckled around her ankle and put them on. She stood and checked the floor-length mirror in her room. Her hands skimmed over her stomach and hips. The material clung to her curves like a second skin, and she had to admit that she looked hot.
