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“Oh, my fucking God!” Astrid gasps, practically crawling into Jagger’s lap. The lucky bastard.
“Not a fan of clowns, huh?” I laugh, realizing what the issue is.
She looks at me. “Clowns are Satan’s minions sent to distract us with their balloon animals and big feet while they suck out our souls,” she says, completely serious.
I can’t help it. I laugh in her face. Jagger is fighting back a laugh of his own, but he’s much better at it than me, which is why I’m the one she’s looking at, like she’s plotting my murder.
“Just you wait. One day, when the world is overrun by zombies—”
“Wait, zombies? I thought you had an issue with clowns?”
“And who do you think will be controlling the armies of the undead?”
“Right, of course, clowns. I should have thought of that.” Said nobody ever.
“Exactly. People are taken in by their painted faces and fake smiles. But all that makeup does is hide the killers beneath.”
“Maybe the makeup is just a deterrent so the zombies won’t eat them,” Jagger jokes. But Astrid tilts her head as if considering his words.
“That makes sense. You see it with creatures in nature all the time—chameleons, frogs, even some species of spider. The colors act as a warning. Danger, do not eat me.”
I nod, knowing in this moment that it would be so damn easy to fall in love with this woman.
“I can see that. If there was a line of clowns and you were standing with them, I’d choose to eat you every time too.”
This time, Jagger does laugh. But Astrid doesn’t pay him any attention as she points her finger at me. “If you ever find me in a line-up with a bunch of clowns, it means I’ve been kidnapped. Again.”
“Then I’ll be sure to rescue you and eat you afterward.”
Her eyes widen as she finally realizes what I’m talking about. “I… You... Dammit, Slade,” she curses before turning back to the movie. I reach for the remote and pause it.
“Come on, I’m only teasing.” I reach for her when I realize she’s genuinely angry.
“You’re sending me mixed signals. It feels like some kind of test I’m gonna fail because I didn’t know I needed to study for it. Hell, I don’t even know what the test is for. Are you deciding my worth? Is there a punishment if I don’t meet your expectations?”
“Hey.” I pick her up and sit her on my lap, facing me, with her straddling my legs, hating that she seems genuinely upset. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.”
“You didn’t. It’s the stupid clowns,” she grumbles with a pout, refusing to admit anything.
“Clowns make you sad now?”
“Clowns should make everyone sad. Like, were clowns always evil, or did something tragic happen to make them that way? And what happens to clown babies? Can they—”
“God, you’re adorable.”
Her mouth slams closed, and her eyes widen, making her look like an anime character.
“I know I’m confusing the fuck out of you right now. I’m confusing myself. You stumbled in here looking like something out of a fairy tale, and I wanted you so fucking bad. When I realized you could be a potential threat, I was pissed. Pissed at myself for wanting you. Pissed at you for tempting me. I know it’s not fair, but it’s been a long fucking time since I’ve craved anything as much as I crave you. I’ll admit, I haven’t handled it well.”
She cocks an eyebrow at that.
“How about a do-over? Hi, I’m Slade. I think you’re so fucking beautiful it hurts to breathe, but I have a fucked up past and lash out when I’m angry.”
I hold my hand out to her and wait to see if she’ll respond. She looks from my hand to my face, her eyes boring into mine, looking for the lie. She won’t find one, at least not about this.
Eventually, she slips her hand into mine and shakes it. “Hi, my name is Astrid. I think you’re really handsome, even with the perma-frown you’ve got going on. I can see the future, but because all I see is death, it messed me up, and I turn into a raving bitch as a defense mechanism to protect my soft spots.”
“I promise to be careful of your soft spots in the future,” I murmur, sliding a strand of hair behind her ear.
