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“What?” she shrieks and I feel Junie’s pain like a fifty-pound weight on my chest. We’ve had to make exceptions our entire life, and now this. When Daddy stays firm on his order, Junie slams her fists to her sides and marches down the hallway toward the stairs without another word.
“Marcus…” Mama Mallory breathes, pleading with my dad.
“No, Mal. This is the way it’s going to be. I’m not changing my mind on this.” Something passes between them, one of those parent type conversations that children aren’t privy to. But I don’t think my dad is telling her everything. I get the feeling he’s been keeping a lot from us lately. Upstairs, Juniper’s bedroom door slams shut and all of us women jolt with the sound. Without another word, I get up calmly and take the path that my sister took. I don’t even have words for my parents right now.
CHAPTERNINETEEN
LENNOX
I’m in my room,trying to cool off after the altercation and listening to the pounding beat of Juniper’s music. My parents are going to let it rest tonight even though I’ve heard the raised voices floating up the stairs. Ma is especially not happy. She has already messaged me asking me not to make any rash decisions, which probably has something to do with me reminding Daddy I’m eighteen. I can technically leave whenever I want. And I have the money for it. Sure, my life won’t be as extravagant as it is living here, but I’d manage. It isn’t like I haven’t thought about doing it before.
I’m laying back on my bed when my phone alerts me of a message.
Benny: Hey, baby. How ya doin?
The vice around my chest eases, knowing he’s out there thinking about me—always my protector.
Me: Been better. My dad is being an asshole. He’s hired guards to watch over us.
Three dots bounce around for a moment before Benny finally sends something. He’s hesitant, and that has my hackles rising. It’s not a secret that Benny has agreed with at the very least a driver, but he’d be happy if we had bodyguards. Maybe not if he’d heard my conversation with Junie and her plans to fall in love with her guard. The thought lightens my mood just a little. Benny has never been insecure about our relationship, so I know that would never deter him from having someone with me.
Benny: It will all be alright.
It will all be alright?Yep, I’m annoyed. I should never have said anything to Benny because I knew he’d be on my dad’s side. Even so, Benny is my person and I want to vent about this. Keeping myself cooped up in my room, under my parents’ roof, isn’t helping one bit, so I grab my robe from my closet and slip on my flip-flops, then sneak out of my room. I take the staff staircase that leads toward the back of the house and down into the kitchen so my parents won’t see or hear me. Not like they’re going to hear much other than their own voices, anyway.
The outside air is a welcome relief. My room was feeling like a prison. A nice prison with all the amenities of a five-star hotel, but still a prison. I’ve always been an active person, so sitting around in my room on a Saturday evening when everyone else is out celebrating our graduation isn’t working for me. I hadn’t wanted to go to the club and honestly, I still don’t, but out of spite, it’s looking more and more appealing.
It doesn’t take long to make it across the yard to the guest house where, even though I’m peeved with him, the love of my life awaits. I give one quick knock before I open the door.
The guest house is what one would expect from my family—somewhat extravagant without being too showy. It’s an open concept with the kitchen to the left of the front door and the living space to the right. There is a half bath downstairs, and upstairs, there is a full size master suite with two extra bedrooms and a full bath in the hallway. My parents felt like a guest house should remain neutral in colors so it’s draped in beiges, tans, and whites. It isn’t ugly by any means, but it certainly lacks character.
What they lacked in color choices didn’t trickle into their choices in furniture. The couch is dark beige but overstuffed and massive. So big that you sink into it and question if your future is really worth getting out of it. Across from that are two recliners of equal mass in more of a cream color. Between them rests a raw wood coffee table looking like they cut it straight out of a tree with legs added to it. Scattered all around are Benny’s school books and he is perched on the floor, of all places. Just like him to force himself to remain so focused that he refuses to use the couch.
“Hey, baby.” His words are chipper, but when he peels his eyes away to look at me, a frown mars his handsome features. His mussed hair is adorable, strewn about with the stress of studying, his eyes tired and lined with rings that lack of sleep provides. Letting the papers he’s reading over fall to the desk, he gets up. “You’re upset over this.”
“I am.” He agrees with my father and that miffs me, but when his hands cup my cheeks, everything melts away for a whisper of a moment. His kiss is gentle against my lips and when he’s finished with those, it trails up to my nose, then to my forehead, before he kisses the top of my head and pulls me into his chest.
“I’m sorry this is so difficult for you. Is there anything I can do to make it better?” That question is rhetorical because we are both aware there is nothing he can do short of killing any guard my father brings in or whisking me away to a castle somewhere and creating new identities. “You know I want to commiserate with you and tell you that you should be upset—”
“But?” I ask, my question muffled by his chest and my back drawing up. Here is my lesson that I’m not willing to learn right now. Regardless, the good thing about Benny, whether I want to murder him for it at this moment or not, is he will always give me the truth.
“I’m sorry, baby, but I agree with him. It’s not safe, and I’ve been telling you that you need someone. I know it sucks, but that’s the nature of your life. You know we all have our own things to deal with.” I hear him. I do. What my father is doing makes complete sense and after worrying that Benny’s ties to the Devils caused this and me to doubt him, I should be totally on board, but I’m not. Hell, I should be worried that someone out there wants me dead. But I won’t have any of it. Not right now. Right now, I’m tired of living this life.
“So you’re saying no to the club, to going out at all…” Jesus, I can’t get anyone aside from my sister on my side. I know my parents are a team. If I try to talk to Ma, she’ll shoot me down as well. Understandable and I would never pit my parents against one another. So I get it, but that doesn’t mean I have to like it.
“Until Monday, when the guards are here. Your dad hired a private security firm—” Despite his closeness and the way he calms me, my mood is turning spiteful. I can’t help it. I back away from him, keeping my arms around his waist but far enough I can look up at him. How does he know who my dad hired? Has he been conspiring with him?
Just to be an ass, I toss out, “Who, the Devils? Don’t they work security?”
Something flickers in his eyes but vanishes in an instant. It doesn’t take the doubt with it, though. “They do but, no, he didn’t hire the Devils. The last thing we need here is more gang activity. He just needs time to find some good guys. The firm is sending out men last minute while they vet some new hires to become your permanent guards.”
“How do you know all of this?” At least he has the decency to look guilty as he lets go of me and backs away to rub his palms together. In that moment, the weight of everything Benny always carries seems to settle on his shoulders. I let my hackles go down because I don’t want to put Benny through this. He has always taken on enough to deal with that he doesn’t have to. Number one being the safety of everyone he loves and his fear of losing them, but I don’t forget the anger coursing through me. “I talked to your dad last week about guards. I wasn’t suggesting anything, just… We just brought it up, tossing around ideas, and he put the call in.” The silence that follows his statement is heavy. I have no right to be mad at Benny, but I’m pissed. Anger that isn’t like me comes on stronger, forcing me back a few steps. This isn’t fair to any of us. My reaction especially isn’t fair to him. I just feel… betrayed that he went behind my back and talked to my dad about this.
I square my shoulders, and without another word, I turn on my heel and walk out.
“Babe, c’mon!” he calls out after me, but I don’t stop. I need a damn moment before I say something that will hurt him.
“I need some space, Benny. Don’t follow me.” I pick up my pace and by the time I make it out of the guest house and into the night air, I’m almost running, trying to outrun what has become my life at the moment. It’s as if everything and everyone is against me and there is nothing I can do about it.
