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Hope burns through me, and all I can do is pray they let him go.
“Ye know, I would think ye’d want ye wife and kid dead the way ye’re refusin’ ta tell me what I want and need.” The arsehole presses the barrel of the gun against Da’s head, and the next few minutes pass by in seconds.
“There are two comin’ in. Tuesday and Friday,” Da tells him and the moment the words are out of his mouth, the gunshot rings through the air. It’s as if I can feel the bullet hit me because I go down. Fallin’ ta my knees, I watch as another and another bullet fills Da’s head and chest, and the men walk away, leavin’ him fer dead.
And it’s the moment I realise I’m truly feckin’ broken.
“I will find him, Da,” I whisper into the darkness. “And I will make him pay.”
That night changed my life. I knew I couldn’t stay in Italy. I hadn’t taken the oath. I wasn’t bound to the mafia rules, so I walked away. Ma stayed in Italy, while I moved to Belfast where Da was born and raised. But there wasn’t much fer me in Ireland.
My focus was on revenge. I wanted ta see the bastards who killed Da to pay. I was desperate ta get my vengeance, but they were too well protected by the Irish mob. Instead of findin’ them, fightin’ my way through their security, I went off the feckin’ rails. All I felt was frustration and rage, I lost myself ta drink and women.
But then I found a new home.
I’m part of a new family now.
Ma still calls to talk to me, to make sure I’m alive and well. I’ll always be her baby. That’s what she’s told me anyway. But when I decided to leave Italy fer good and move to Ireland, I know it broke her heart. I travel ta see her as often as I can and she’s been ta visit me here in Belfast a couple of times, but I know she misses me.
I left Italy and the mafia three years ago.
Now I’m a biker.
I’ve known Monster, the President of the Royal Bastards MC, since I was in my teens. When he took over the club, I was still working for the mafia, and I helped with the gun shipments being supplied to the MC.
It took time for trust and respect ta form between us. But then one night, after we’d done a couple of jobs, Monster and I were in a pub together, and the fecker knocked me out because we’d been eyein’ up the same lassie. He won, and I stepped back. That’s when I knew we’d always be best mates.
TWO
CALLIA
The Past
Sixteen Years Old
When I get home after school, I go straight ta my bedroom. The woman who’s meant ta look after me, Mrs Duffy, has her boyfriend and his mates over again. I don’t like them, and when they’re drinkin’, it’s worse. Her husband up and left her with nothin’ a long time ago. The sob story she told ta the social services lady, who brought me here, about her needin’ someone to care fer was a pile of shite.
The noise from their partyin’ gets louder and louder, and I spend most of the evenin’ in my bedroom, only venturin’ into the kitchen when I feel like I’m about ta pass out from not eatin’.
I lie on my bed and pray they’ll soon head out fer the night. Her boyfriend owns a strip club in the city, one that’s well known fer havin’ girls of my age dancin’ on the bar, performin’ on the stage, and even workin’ in the back rooms. When ye’re from the rough side of the city, everyone expects ye ta be easy-goin’ about sex, drugs, and anythin’ else that’s on offer.
I’ve managed ta keep myself away from that side of Mrs Duffy’s life. But now I’ve turned sixteen, she’s been encouragin’ me ta work in the club that vile bastard owns. Part of my daily fight with the woman I’m meant ta call Ma, but can’t bring myself ta do it, is that I don’t want ta become one of those girls.
Thankfully, I haven’t had ta work at the club yet, but I know it won’t be long before I’m forced ta go. I want ta study, to become something more than dependent on a feckin’ arsehole who’ll end up breakin’ my heart when he leaves.
Everyone leaves me.
I don’t remember my biological parents, and I don’t want to. I was abandoned by them and put into the system before I could walk—at least that’s what I was told. While in foster care, I had more placements than I care ta remember, but no one wanted ta keep me.
When I was taken in by Mrs Duffy and she promised me a family, I figured I’d be happy. But I’ve learnt that the word family doesn’t always ensure safety, and I’ve resigned myself ta the fact I’ll never truly have a home.
