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“And any other time,” Breena adds with a knowing smile. “Lucy can make anything grow anywhere.”
“It’s my gift.” Lucy shrugs and gestures for us to sit on the quilt. “I have some pumpkin spice lattes on the way for us. Jonas is fetching them.”
“I love fall,” Breena says with a happy sigh, closing her eyes and breathing in the crisp autumn air. “And the delicious drinks that come with it.”
“You know, we can make pumpkin spice all year round,” I remind her. “We don’t have to save it for this time of year.”
“I don’t think it packs the same punch in July as it does in October,” Lucy says, turning her hurt, cool gaze on me. “Now, let’s stop circling around the subject at hand.”
“I love you,” I say immediately, just how I did with Breena. “More than anything, I love you both, and I’m sorry I hurt you. If I could go back and change it all, I would in a heartbeat. Is there a tapestry we can weave to make that happen?”
Lucy deflates. “Just when I have a good mad going, you go and ruin it. No need to weave another magical tapestry. But we do need to talk this out. Because Lorelei.”
“I know.”
We hear footsteps, and all of us turn to see Jonas walking toward us, so tall, lean, and handsome, carrying a tray filled with hot to-go cups.
“I have a delivery,” he says with that kind smile of his as he squats and offers one to each of us.
“Did you get yourself one, too?” Lucy asks him, eyeing the fourth cup on the tray.
“No, I got one for Delia. She’s earned it. Have a good chat, ladies.”
He winks at his wife, and then he’s off, headed into the apothecary.
“Jonas is pretty great,” I say as I sip my drink. “And I agree with you. This just hits differently in October. So good. Anyway, back on topic.”
We all sip our drinks happily.
“You were right, Luce. And, man, that pissed me off at the time, but you’re totally right. For whatever reason, I wanted to wear my hurt and anger like a shield against Xander, and I didn’t call you guys to help me pretty much out of stubborn spite. It was wrong and childish.”
“Why didn’t you tell us after?” Breena asks. “That’s what I don’t understand. I can see you being scared and confused while it was all happening—and things can happen quickly. But after, you still didn’t tell us anything.”
“Because it was done, and you didn’t know about the baby in the first place. I just thought I’d spare you all that hurt.”
Lucy narrows her eyes at me.
“Don’t call that out as bullshit. Even if it sounds like BS, it’s not. That’s really how I felt about it in the moment, whether it’s right or wrong. And, yes, I can see now that it’s wrong. I mean, I didn’t even tell my mom. And I should have, because I could have used all your support, both then and now.”
“Well, you have it now,” Lucy says, rolling her eyes.
“I do? But you’re so mad at me.”
“Of course, I’m mad at you. But I love you. Even though you’re a big jerk.”
That makes me grin at her. “Yeah, I am a big jerk.”
“The biggest,” Breena agrees gleefully as she sips her delicious drink.
“I thought this would be so much harder,” I admit and stare down at the lid of my latte. “Because you’ve never been that mad at me before, even when I accidentally cut your bangs too short in the sixth grade.”
“I felt betrayed,” Lucy admits softly. “I felt like the world had fallen out from under me. Because out of all the possible things you could have said happened, that was the last thing I would have expected. The three of us tell each other everything. Everything. And you were going to have a baby and didn’t tell us.”
“I wanted it to be an awesome Yule surprise. There were so many moments that I wanted to tell you. I almost just blurted it out several times. But I didn’t find out until I was about ten weeks along. My periods have always been wonky, so I didn’t think much of it, and then Xander suggested I take a test just to be sure. And there it was. So, I saw the doctor, and it was so close to Yule we decided to wait.”
“It would have been a lovely Yule gift,” Breena assures me, always the peacekeeper. “And we would have loved it.”
“Thank you.” I lean over and bump her shoulder with mine. “I’m not proud of any of it. And I can say that I went to California to get away from Xander, but the truth is, I ran away so I could avoid all of it. So I wouldn’t have to tell you about it, and I wouldn’t have to think about the baby or look at Xander and feel resentment and vulnerability with him.”
