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After Kim had fluttered off somewhere else, Jax turned back toward me, his face lit up like a Christmas tree.
“Holy shit, right?” he said.
“You okay?” I asked.
He swallowed, looking up at the sky and then back down to me. “I’ve never felt anything like that.”
I gave him a polite nod. “It’s a rush, sometimes, knowing you’re being filmed. I’m glad you liked it.”
He smiled and reached for my hand, clasping it in his and bringing it up to his lips. He pressed his lips to the back of my palm over and over again in little kisses, clearly rolling on an adrenaline high.
“God, this is going to be fun,” he said, pausing to give one of my knuckles a little nibble before letting my hand go. It made me feel all melty inside, because of course it did. I missed his touch the moment he’d let me go.
“Being on TV? It’ll be fun.”
“Getting to do this with you, I meant,” he told me. “Your fans are going to love us. I guarantee it.”
I cleared my throat. “Would be hard not to love you, I guess.”
“And it’ll be impossible for anyone not to love you.”
This man is going to fucking destroy me, I thought simply, as he led me back over toward the center of the festival, acting absolutely perfectly in his role.
4
JAX
Since I’d started dating Charlie—well, fake dating—it had been hard enough to pay attention in class.
For years, I’d had no trouble with focus. Lectures usually absorbed me completely, and I hung on every word the professors said, totally in the zone.
But sitting outside on a bench this morning, right before my Childhood Development class, I’d seen something that sent my mind running. It had been a week since the fall festival, and this morning, the Fixer Brothers’ show producers had just released another exclusive sneak peek snippet video to their social media pages. I clutched my phone harder the moment I saw it, my eyes glued to the screen.
I was looking for footage of the kiss.
The video featured a few moments of me and Charlie walking around the festival. Nice shots of pumpkins and cider stands and hayrides. And then there it was: a very brief, shadowy glimpse of the moment we’d shared, filmed from behind a tree like it was supposed to be a secret. It was clear from the way it was framed that the producers wanted the kiss to be something fans had to catch—not obvious that it was a kiss on first glance.
But the die-hard fans would figure it out.
That kiss. The damn kiss I hadn’t been able to stop thinking about all week. All week, I’d felt like I was going crazy, jerking off every night in a fevered haze before falling asleep and dreaming about it some more. I wasn’t even sure anymore what turned me on more: the fact that we’d kissed or the fact that there was a very real chance we were going to be asked to do it again.
Professor Duncan finally arrived and I pocketed my phone.
“Morning, Jax. Hi, Katie,” Prof Duncan said, nodding at us both and unlocking the classroom door.
I walked into the classroom with a few other students, my mind entirely on the social media post. I chose an old desk and sat down, the wood creaking as I sat down. Prof Duncan headed to the front of the classroom, scrawling out a list of today’s class topics on the whiteboard, and I snuck in another moment to look at my phone.
I watched the video a few times, deliciously reliving the moment as I watched it on screen. There was still part of me that couldn’t believe that was me. I tapped on the comments. Charlie and I were doing this for publicity, after all, and I wanted to see if it was working.
Immediately my stomach started to sink. I frowned at the screen, thumbing through it, my chest tightening with every comment I read.
No, no, no.
This wasn’t supposed to be how it went. The comments were unrelenting:
Found the younger dude’s profile on a dating app. He’s straight.
Idk, I’m starting to think it’s a publicity thing.
Hot as fuck, but yeah, fake.
No, I don’t want it to be fake, they’re so cute together.
My skin got hotter. I felt like I’d been caught in the act of something illegal, even though this was supposed to all be for fun. The real TV show hadn’t even premiered yet, for God’s sake. This was all just online promotion.
“Something more interesting on your phone, there, Jax?”
I looked up to see Professor Duncan looking down at me from the front of the small lecture hall. Class had begun five minutes ago, and I’d tuned out everything he’d been saying.
“I’m so sorry,” I said, locking my phone and sliding it back into my pocket. Every bone in my body felt sick with embarrassment.
