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Her comment makes me feel physically sick. The thought of Keller with another woman gives me a stabbing pain at my core. He’s not mine. I have absolutely no claim to him. Yet he will always own a piece of me.
Attempting to fake a smile, I tell her how we agreed last night to get it out of our systems so we can get on with our lives.
“That sounds like an incredibly stupid idea by two completely clueless people. You clearly have an insane connection and epic compatibility. Why not delve into it? You can’t let a chance of true happiness get away.”
Christ, I feel like I’m back at school being told off.
Immediately, that gets my back up. “I’m not looking for a fairytale, Maddie. Last night was perfect. Why ruin it? I’m not letting another man trample on my heart and ruin my self-esteem. So one night is all we can be. Christ, just search his name. You’ll see a different woman draping off his arm like a lost puppy in every article. The man isn’t a one woman kinda guy. So it looks like Nana, one orgasm Sienna, will have to stay.” I try to get my breath back from my explosion of words.
I’m right. I know I am. I have to be.
Even as I say the words out loud, I truly don’t believe that was the last I’ll see of Keller. He’s a ruthless fighter. If he wants me, he’s going to have to work for it.
“Okay, whatever you say,” she laughs, giving me an eye roll.
“Right. I gotta go shower and have a nap. I’m exhausted.” With that, I slip off Maddie’s bed with a thud on the floor.
“I bet you are,” she calls out after me.
Flipping on the hot water, I slip out of yesterday's clothes and step in. The harsh droplets beat down against me, the temperature so hot I'm almost instantly red. Reaching for the shower gel, I lather my hands and make my way up my body. The remains of the marks Keller left dot my skin like artwork and I trace over them. His fingerprints are now burnt into my skin, claiming me.
He knew what he was doing, reminding me of the power he has over my body, my soul, and my thoughts. Looking down at my breasts, my eyes go wide in horror at the angry-looking bite marks scattered across them. The memory of the pain and the pleasure, dancing in my brain.
I wonder if he’s as caught up in last night as I am.
I step out of the shower and grab a towel, wrapping it snugly around my body. I spy myself in the mirror. Maddie was right; I look freshly fucked. More than that, looking at my reflection, with those fresh marks glaring red. I don’t feel ashamed or self-conscious. No. I look hot. For the first time in a long, long time, I feel desirable.
After drying off my hair and lathering my face in my whole skin care collection, my skin is practically shining. There’s nothing a bit of vitamin C serum can’t solve.
Finally sprawling out into bed, my head hits the pillow and I grab my phone off the nightstand. I haven’t checked it since I got home a few hours ago.
No more messages from Jamie. Perhaps he has finally got the hint. Thank you, Keller.
A text pops up from Grayson, and a smile passes over my lips.
Grayson
Hi pretty lady, just checking in to make sure we’re all good for tomorrow. I’ve even managed to rope in a celebrity appearance for them. He’s agreed to help out with the session if that’s ok? Speak soon. Grayson x x
Grayson Ward, co-owner of King’s Gym over in Midtown and boxing trainer to the stars. We’ve only ever spoken a few times over the phone. He certainly has a way with the ladies. Flirting seems to be necessary in every conversation he has with the opposite sex. Not that I mind, I imagine by the sound of his thick voice laced with flirtation that he won’t be bad looking, that’s for sure.
Quickly tapping back my response, keeping it as professional as I can.
Me
Hey Grayson. Yep, all still on for tomorrow. Thank you so much for all your help with this. We really appreciate it. The kids are going to love meeting a famous boxer! See you tomorrow. x
He responds immediately:
Grayson
Great, see you tomorrow *winky face* x
I chuckle. The man can’t help himself. I bet his whole text chain is full of those winky faces, ha- and the rest.
I started speaking to Grayson a couple of weeks ago. I volunteer a couple of weekends a month at a local start-up charity - Young Minds. A charity dedicated to giving kids in low-income families educational tools they wouldn’t necessarily come across any other way. Some of the kids come from loving homes which just struggle to scrape by, not affording luxuries like kids’ clubs or being able to pay for hobbies for their kids. For other kids, this charity is a lifeline. Their parents choosing, much like my own mother, to hit the bottle rather than care for their kids. It breaks my heart. Seeing these kids’ faces light up at the smallest acts of kindness, indicates that isn’t a normal thing for them.I wonder if I would be less fucked up if I had something like this as a kid.
I’ve helped organize, with the help of Grayson, a boxing training day for the kids at the King’s Gym. They are going to lose their minds when they get to meet this celebrity boxer Grayson’s talking about. Each weekend, we let them try either a different sport or hobby and if they love it, we try to help them go regularly.
