AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Now I’m baffled. “Come on, you haven’t fucked up.”
“You’ve got it the wrong way around,” she whispers.
“The wrong way around?” I frown, trying to work out what she means. I told her I wanted to get to know her better. I tried to explain that I wasn’t only after sex…
My eyebrows rise as it sinks in. “You mean… you’re only looking for a one-night stand?”
She nods behind her hands.
Whoa. My head spins. I didn’t expect that. Not because I haven’t met girls who are only interested in sex, but because she hadn’t struck me as being one of them.
She only wants to sleep with me? I feel a strange mixture of pleasure and disappointment. I want her; of course I want her—she’s gorgeous. But I was hoping for more than that.
“Why are you embarrassed?” I ask. “There’s nothing wrong with that. People have one-night stands all the time.”
“I wasn’t going to say anything, but you’re such a nice guy, and I can’t lie to you.”
“Alice, I’m confused. Why weren’t you going to say anything? And what do you mean, ‘I can’t lie to you’?”
“I thought you might not notice, but it’s not fair not to say anything…”
I might not notice? I take her hands and pull them away from her face. “Alice…”
She drops her hands and huffs an exasperated sigh. “I’m a virgin.”
*
Alice
Kip stares at me. “What?”
“I haven’t had sex,” I say grouchily. “Ever.”
“What? You’re gorgeous. How on earth have you got to twenty-five without sleeping with anyone?”
I give another long sigh, flattered by his compliment but too annoyed with myself to react to it. “I have family commitments that mean I don’t have much free time. And now I’m twenty-five and inexperienced, and I meancompletely. I haven’t even kissed a guy since I was sixteen.”
“Jesus.” He’s looking at me as if I’ve told him I’m a mermaid, with a kind of wondrous disbelief.
Then he tips his head to the side, his brows drawing together. “I still don’t quite understand. It’s nothing to be ashamed of. It’s something to be celebrated, surely? When you meet the right guy, you can get to know one another slowly. Any man worth his salt will be patient and gentle your first time.”
I scowl. “I’m not in a Jane Austen novel. I’m not able to date right now, and I don’t want to wait for Mr. Right. I hate my virginity. It’s like a millstone around my neck. I’m sick of listening to jokes about sex and reading about it and watching people having it in the movies, and not being in the secret club. And the more that time goes by, the more anxious I’m getting. I know it’s no big thing. It’s just sex. Tab A into slot B, right? Or C or D, as my sister kindly pointed out.”
He gives a short laugh. “Technically, yeah.”
“In that sense, who does it is irrelevant, right?”
He gives me a pained look. “Alice…”
“I just want to get it over with. So I thought I’d try to find someone on Tinder. And I met this guy yesterday for a drink, and we didn’t have much of a connection, but I thought well, it doesn’t matter, does it? I just need his… equipment.”
He closes his eyes and strokes his thumb and forefinger over his eyebrows. “Alice…”
“So I suggested going back to his place, but on the way he kissed me, and he shoved his tongue in my mouth, and…” My voice trails off at the look on his face as he lowers his hand. “Let’s just say I ended it there,” I finish.
“Jesus.”
“And then I met you, and we’ve gotten on so well, and the opposite has happened. You want to see me again, and I can’t do that. And I like you so much… But I can’t just take you back to my room and have sex with you without telling you. It’s not fair on you. You’re going to expect a girl to do all kinds of stuff, and I’m so clueless. I’m going to be terrible. And now that’s it. I’ve ruined it. God I’m such an idiot.” I put my face in my hands again.
