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“Ohmy,” Chantilly said, and in her peripheral vision, Noelle saw her bring her hand to the base of her throat in surprise. “Well, I didn’t expectthat.” She felt the older woman’s considering gaze on her. “And you’re all gussied up for him, are you?”
She opened her mouth to deny it, but Chantilly had seen her almost every day for the past seven years, on regular workdays and on special occasions. She knew very well when Noelle wasgussied upand when she wasn’t. “I needed some confidence,” she admitted.
“Well, getting gussied up will do that for a girl,” she said, patting the underside of her swept-up hair. “Why is he here, and how did he take the news about Callie?”
“He was angry. And hurt. Mostly hurt, I think.”
“I see.”
“As far as why he’s here, I don’t know yet. He has something to discuss with me, apparently. I think it has to do with our past.” Despite the warmth of the room, she shivered, wrapping her arms around herself and running her hands over her bare arms.
“Your past ...,” Chantilly said.
Noelle nodded, swallowing. “I know I haven’t told you all about that, Chantilly—”
“I looked it up,” she said.
Noelle’s head pivoted her way, her mouth falling open.
“Oh, don’t look so surprised. You know very well I’m a nosy nelly.” When Noelle only blinked at her, she went on. “You’ve grown into a poised, confident woman since you first arrived, so young and so timid, wearing a tiny baby bump. At first I wondered if you’d been abused,” she said. “There was such a haunted look in your eyes. I thought it must be your daughter’s father who’d hurt you so terribly. But then each time I mentioned him, though you were evasive and only told me he didn’t know he had a child, your eyes filled with ... what I thought might be love. And so I wondered ...” She examined her perfectly manicured nails for a moment. “I went online. I read about the terrible crime committed against you so many years ago. I’d feared the child might belong to ...” She waved her hand around as though the words were too terrible to utter aloud and should instead be brushed away.One of the men who raped you.“But the timing wasn’t quite right. And so then I figured Callie’s father was a man you met shortly afterward, when you were still recovering from what happened to you, too traumatized to settle down with anyone. Too afraid to love. Am I close?”
Too afraid to love.Maybe. But she thought the more apt description was that she’d really been incapable of love. Or a healthy form anyway. And more than that, she’d been especially incapable with Evan. She suddenlywantedto talk about all this with Tilly. She wanted to let her in on her fears, and regrets, and she wanted to hear her words of wisdom. They’d been close for many years, but she realized suddenly that she’d also kept her at a certain arm’s distance, believing that Tilly would view her differently if she knew what she’d survived. “Oh, Tilly.” She sighed. “I’m sorry. I should have told you. At first, I couldn’t. And then ... it became so easy to pretend I wasonlythis new version ofmyself. I wanted you to knowher, not that traumatized victim who’d been running away.”
Chantilly reached out and put her hand over Noelle’s where it rested on the settee. “I understand the desire to run away, my darling. You know I do.” Yes. Noelle did know that. Chantilly had often referred to her monster of a husband. It was an open secret that he had abused her terribly, causing the injury that had put her in a wheelchair before he died. She’d inherited the beautiful property that had once belonged to the Calhouns, and she had turned it into a picturesque vacation spot for families. She’d never had one of her own, but now she was surrounded by them. “But,” Tilly said, patting her hand, “you ran from him as well, didn’t you?”
“I suppose,” Noelle said. “In a manner of speaking. But he needed the distance too. We discussed it and we agreed. Later, when I found out I was pregnant, I made the decision to stick with that agreement.”
“The terms had changed,” Tilly noted.
“Yes. They had. I was wrong, I guess.”
Tilly raised a perfectly arched brow. Noelle knew very well what it was in response to.I guess.“Does he want to know his daughter?”
“He wants to spend some time with her. I told him he could come along tonight.”
“And then?”
Noelle let out a small laugh. “I have no idea. I’ll hear the reason why he came here. And then I guess he’ll go back to Reno, where he lives.”
“I see.” There was a short pause, and Noelle looked at Chantilly to see that she was considering her as she tapped a nail to her lips. “This dress,” she said, her gaze moving down Noelle’s body. “Are you sure it’s only to inspire confidence?”
Noelle gave her a small eye roll, knowing what Chantilly was suggesting. “Yes. I mean, firstly, he’s angry with me. Secondly, any connection we ever had is based on ... very unhealthy things. And as if thatisn’t enough, he might be with someone for all I know. It didn’t exactly come up.”
“Ring?” she asked.
Noelle let out another small laugh. This woman was ridiculous, but she was so thankful for her. Her mother had been murdered when she was still a girl, and although she’d missed her over the years, she also knew she was very lucky to have both a friend and confidante in Tilly. A mother of sorts, but also a friend who she trusted implicitly. “No ring.”
Tilly took in a breath, looking satisfied. “Tilly,” Noelle warned. “Really. It’s so much more complicated than that. Complicated doesn’t even begin to cover it.”
“Hmm,” she hummed. “Okay, well, I’d like to say one more thing if I might.” She took Noelle’s hand again, leaning forward slightly. “I’m so very, very sorry for what happened to you, my darling. But mostly, I’m proud. What you did ... escaping ...recovering... from something so deeplyevil. You are the strongest person I’ve ever known. Find happiness.”
“I have found happiness.”
“Findmore. Go after it with gusto in whatever way you are able. You did not crawl out of that cage to live a timid life.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
Evan saw them immediately—the feminine figure he’d know anywhere, still, even after all this time, holding the hand of the little girl.Hislittle girl. The thought still made him dizzy. He’d spent the day attempting to organize his emotions, and he’d thought he had a handle on them, but one glance and the earthquake that had rolled under his feet when he’d first seen her was rumbling again, even if the magnitude was slightly less.
