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I just want Damon.
Everything else we can figure out together.
SIXTEEN
Damon
“We are not watching this crap again,” I huff because Bennet and his love of cheesy movies with explosions and guns galore is ridiculous. He says he loves these things because he grew up in Kansas and spent his youth setting things on fire. I thought it was a joke until I went there and realized that it was basically the Wild Midwest.
“Don’t be a diva. It’s my turn to pick and I pick this,” Bennet says, stealing the remote from my hand and starting up one of the millions of racecar movies with the overly buff dude and the angry lady. I’ve seen a thousand of them already and can’t quite keep the names straight. All I know is that two years ago, Bennet watched one of these, thought his car was meant for full speed, and ended up blowing his engine up on the freeway.
The thought of it still makes me cackle inside.
“You comfortable?” Tomas asks, his hand on my side.
I nod and then lean up and kiss his lips softly. It feels far too good being here in Tomas’s living room, stretched out on his couch while Jasper and Bennet cuddle up on the other side of the couch and Carter and Reed nuzzle into each other’s necks on the large overstuffed chair in the corner.
Tonight, the moms are watching Hannah so we decided to have an MMM—movie-margarita-mask—night. Tomas has green goop on his face and those little booties that have softening chemicals on his feet. Same with the rest of us, although Carter and Reed washed theirs off already. Their hands are currently stuffed in cloth gloves for a much-needed major skin rehab.
Tomas should look ridiculous with us, being so masculine, tattooed, and rugged, but he doesn’t. He fits right in. How that’s even possible is beyond me. He just continues to blow my mind with how he takes everything in stride. I’m so into this guy it’s not even funny.
I glance up at Tomas, and he smiles back down at me. Even with all the green on his face he is so incredibly handsome. I am so damn glad I decided to spend some more time here. Maybe I’ll extend it out even more so I can have more time with him. Although, my job can’t wait forever. I do need to get back on screen to keep my income steady.
“Quiet, Jasper,” Bennet says, and Jasper rolls his eyes, making his face mask crack slightly.
“Oh, puhleeeze. This movie is so predictable. I won’t be silenced,” Jasper snarks, and Tomas lets out a soft laugh. I love how he’s getting used to my friends, to their usual quirks, and that he’s just settled into our dynamic so fluidly.
And not to mention, I think my friends are starting to like Tomas as well, even Jasper. I saw him quirk a smile at him earlier, despite him trying to hide it.
Suddenly, my phone vibrates at my side, and I set my margarita down to glance at it. For a second, I wonder who would be messaging me when all the people I love are right here.
Glancing down, I see an unknown number blinking up at me. I quickly swipe to see what it says.
Unknown:
Hey, this is Leo. Carter gave me your number. I thought maybe we could set up a collab sometime soon.
He’s attached a clip, and I don’t hit play but the preview is enough for me to see it’s obviously a porn clip on his Twitter account.
“Carter?” I look over at my friend, who is currently trying to scratch his nose with his gloved hand. “Do you know a Leo?”
His pink cheeks suddenly fall, and he turns slightly pale. “Oh shit.” He looks at Tomas—who looks worriedly at me—and then settles his gaze on me. “I gave him your number months ago. I—”
“He wants to collab?” I ask, feeling a little sick about it. Honestly, a month or so ago, I would have already responded, but right now the thought is making my stomach churn.
Beside me, Tomas stiffens. His body is tense for a second before he’s pulling away from me. It’s slight, but it’s a sharp reminder of our reality. Of who we are. Of how different our lives are at the moment. And about how, despite Tomas trying to get me to talk about it, I’ve never really sat down to discuss what this is to both of us.
Fuck me and my jittery nerves.
“He’s an up-and-comer. Real popular. He said he wanted a shot, and I told him that you would probably be a great introduction. That I’d give him a tryout with you. I…” Carter rarely looks nervous or guilty, but he’s showing signs of both as he looks over at Tomas. “That was before.”
I nod my head in acknowledgment. Carter is technically my boss. He’s the owner of the site, but he doesn’t really tell us what to do. We have some rules to abide by, but we say yes or no to collabs. It’s ultimately our choice.
And I know deep down he wouldn’t have set this up if he knew how I felt about Tomas. Hell, I haven’t even really admitted how I feel, but Carter knows. I know he knows. He can probably see the stupid love-sick twinkle in my eyes. The same thing he has every time he looks at Reed.
“So, um, is he going to be the next big camboy?” Tomas asks, trying to sound interested, but I know it’s forced. I can hear it in the strain of his voice, in the way he swallows loudly. Why won’t he just get all growly and tell me he doesn’t want this Leo, or anyone else, touching me?
Shit, that would be hot, but really, what would I do if he said that?
