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“I want you so much. I’m scared of messing everything up,” I blurted.
7
GRANT
I hadn’t thought it was possible to crave Brody Kelly more than I already did, but hearing those words from his mouth proved me wrong.
He was nervous—highly ironic since that should have beenmyrole here, as the older and probably less experienced of the two of us—but no matter how much I questioned emotions in other areas of my life, there wasn’t a doubt in my mind that Brody wanted this as badly as I did. This mattered to him… maybe even as much as it mattered to me.
For the first time, I didn’t have to think about the bones of the body when I was with him. I could let myself look my fill and want him without restraint.
“You’re not going to mess anything up.” I brushed his hair back from his forehead and leaned in to kiss the edge of his mouth. “You couldn’t. I want you so badly I can barely think straight. But I need you to talk to me. Tell me what you want and what you don’t. I don’t want to do anything that makes you uncomfortable.”
His cheeks were bright red, and the tips of his ears matched. His lips were slick from kissing, and his nose was pink from my beard scruff. He was devastatingly sexy like this, half-naked and in my bed.
“I want everything with you,” he blurted. “But I don’t know how to… tobe.”
A large part of me wanted to fixate on the wordeverything—was he saying that nothing was off the table for him tonight sexually?Or did he mean that he wanted a full-blown relationship?—but I wouldn’t let myself get distracted. My priority was making Brody feel comfortable in this moment.
I stepped between his knees and loosely wrapped my arms around him. “Explain.”
He swallowed hard. “I want you to take control, but I don’t know how much experience you have with other guys, so maybe I should take control? But then you seem like you’re doing pretty good so far.” He laughed nervously. “So I guess I’m just caught up in a second-guessing cycle. Which makes me feel stupid. And then I worry you’ll think I’m too young and silly for you.” He let out a shuddering breath. “I worry you’ll… regret this.”
Brody’s eyes angled down to my chest, and I hated that. I cradled his jaw in both hands and tilted his face up.
“I don’t worry that you’re too young for me. But I do worry that I’m too old for you,” I admitted. “You’re not silly, and you’re sure as hell not stupid. Christ, you’re the most capable, dependable person I know.”
His eyes widened. “You… you work with a team of doctors.”
I cracked a smile. “And my opinion stands.”
Brody huffed out a laugh and lifted his hands to caress my wrists, holding my hands against his cheeks. The simple action made me feel so absurdly good I couldn’t help but lean in and take another quick taste of his mouth.
“As for my experience with guys, I have more than enough to understand the basics.” Even though sex with Brody felt like it was going to be outside the realm of my experience entirely. “I can take control. I do it every day at work, and I like it. I want to take care of you tonight,” I admitted. “If you’re good with that.”
Brody’s eyes kindled with heat. “Yeah. Yeah, I’mgreatwith that.”
I nodded once. “And the only way I’m going to regret tonight, Brody, is if you don’t enjoy yourselfentirely. I’m not always the most observant, so you need to tell me what you’re thinking. Fair?”
He nodded slowly. His gaze dropped to my mouth, and his eyes narrowed with something like challengeas he licked his lips. “Yeah. Okay. Fair.”
“So, tell me…” I dropped my voice an octave to a low purr and pressed in closer, eliminating the space between us. “What are you thinking right now?”
His eyes met mine, a little bashful but still defiant. “I’m, ah… I’m thinking of your experience withother guys.”
Friendly, sweet Brody practically spat the last words, and a bubble of startled laughter rose in my throat. He wasjealous? Christ, I liked that. Possibly too much.
I pulled Brody against me and stripped the blankets down the bed in one desperate movement. Then I pushed him down until his back hit the mattress and reached for the waistband of his pajama pants to pull them off. “How about instead of thinking about me with other people, you just lie back and enjoy me withyou?”
His dick was already rock hard, but it jumped when I drew the fabric down over it. He groaned and squeezed his eyes closed before muttering, “Don’t come yet. Don’t ruin it. Jesus, hold it together.”
It took me a second to realize that he was talking to himself and not to me, and I found myself close to laughter once more.
Had I ever laughed during sex? If so, I couldn’t remember it. But then, with Brody laid out before me like a feast, I couldn’t manage to think of anyone else at all.
I wanted to fuck him. There was no doubt about that. But I was quickly realizing I wanted a whole hell of a lot more than that with Brody, too. He was sexy as hell but also endearing and adorable. One taste wasn’t going to be enough.
He’s yours now. You can taste him more than once,some feral, caveman part of me—a lobe of my brain I’d never heard from before—pointed out. And the thought should have been ludicrous, given our agreement, given my own relationship limitations, but it was damn tempting to listen. To claimthis gorgeous man in truth.
