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While his brother-in-law gathered himself, Adam returned to his line of questioning. “Why did you leave her? The first time.”
“Do you know what happens when a vampire is turned? What happens to our emotions?”
“You become a bloodsucking asshole?” Jenn chimed in.
Icarus ignored her and focused instead on Cormac. “When you shift, what’s it feel like”—Icarus thumped his chest with his fist—“here?”
“Like it wants to explode out of me,” the raven answered.
“No different,” Icarus said. “And I died with equal parts anger and love”—he flattened his hand over his heart—“right here.”
“You went after him,” Adam guessed.
“He was smart enough to hide, but I found him. The only reason I didn’t kill him was because she already had.” He propped his elbows on the table and hung his head in his hands, fingers raking through his magenta strands. “She loved me more than Nature loved Canton, and I’ll never forgive myself for putting her in that position. I made sure she survived the Rift and the transformation, and once I was sure she was safe, I left so she’d be safe from me too.”
“What about your mother?” Cormac asked.
“She’s never forgiven either one of us. Canton was her favorite.”
“But she signed the missing persons report and death certificate?”
He lifted his head. “Do you have a pen?”
One came flying out of the shadowed corner Robin had disappeared into. Icarus caught it without missing a beat, flipped over the copy of the missing persons report, and perfectly replicated Brenda’s signature. Another talent that Adam added to his mental list. “I forged them, and my sister filed them.”
Robin returned to the table. “Why don’t you use her name?”
“Because she’s supposed to be dead. If someone found out she wasn’t, found out what she is...”
“Someone like Atlas or Vincent,” Abigail said.
“This war is older than time, bubbling up through history. The Rift was the last major eruption and the first time in ages where Chaos gained the upper hand, where it forced Nature to retreat.”
Adam covered the frustrated fist Icarus had made while talking. “She hid in your sister.”
Icarus flipped over his hand and laced their fingers together, squeezed, and took a deep breath before continuing. “If they find out what she is, if they harness all that power for Chaos and darkness, or worse—if they kill her while trying to manipulate all that magic, that’s ball game. Humanity and what’s left of this planet dies with her, and we’re plunged into a dark age we’ll never come out of.” He slumped in his chair, as weary as Adam had ever seen him. More than just the past week on his shoulders, he shouldered thirty years of an impossible weight, of a responsibility like no other. “None of us, human or paranormal, can exist without her. She’s the only thing keeping this world in balance.”
THIRTY
An assassin,two detectives, and a vampire with better than average hacking skills could make quick work of excavation. Throw in a coyote and mountain lion working every contact they had between Talahalusi and Portola, and their team had an Atlas and Mary sighting by late morning. They were holed up at a motel on the coast just south of YB, and pressure applied in the right place—a source Abigail had nurtured inside Vincent’s organization—yielded news of a broad daylight meet happening at Portola University later that afternoon.
That meant it was impossible for Icarus to join the extraction op they spent the rest of the morning planning. If Adam hadn’t personally witnessed Icarus lock down his instincts at least twice, he would have been more worried about approaching the man pacing the cellar bunk room, the long maxi skirt and tunic he’d changed into after a shower swishing around him. Icarus had come a long way from the baby vamp who’d almost killed his brother, with no one by his side, no one to fight for him other than Mary. Well, that was over, and Adam wouldn’t let him lose her too. He stepped behind Icarus, clasped his shoulders, and held his ground when Icarus whipped his head around and hissed.
Icarus’s face fell the next second. “I’m sorry,” he whispered.
“I’m not afraid,” Adam replied, likewise speaking softly, the moment a quiet one, too much teetering on the precipice. He coasted his hands down Icarus’s arms, rubbing warmth into them, before he circled his arms around the taller man’s waist, embracing him from behind. “When did you realize?”
“Realize what?”
“That you could lock down your instincts.”
“Senses, technically, which in turn dampens the instincts. And I’d realized too late. She showed me how after Canton. I kept my senses off until it was safe to leave her. It’s saved me since a million times over.” He tilted his head, back against Adam’s. “Saved you a few times too.”
“I can make a call,” he said. “Offer to trade myself for her.”
“And give Vincent exactly what he wants?” Icarus scoffed. “No, and the extraction op is good. Your team is good.”
He kissed the back of Icarus’s shoulder, bared by the wide neck of his tunic. “We pulled Paris out of the fire. We’ll rescue her too.”
