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And then I was overtaken by lust.
I was filled with pride for taking my life back from my father, but I know the adrenaline-fueled lust is fleeting—because it already is.
Plus, my father will come after me, or worse, he’ll tell Nico the truth about why I married him.
Then, tonight. The look. God, the look in Nico’s eyes while he took me to places and showed me things only he can was beyond maddening. It was almost like he felt a closeness with me that he has never had with anyone else. There was… vulnerability… and dare I say genuine care formeand not just what my body can offer or what being his enemy’s daughter could do for him. I was something to him.
But I read it wrong—all of it. I was seeing what I wanted to see.
Am I falling for Nico? No. No way. I don’t know him. We don’t know one another. But I do care for him. I think. I have to, right? Especially after tonight.
Now, I’m naked and feel ashamed of what we just did. We ride this high, we have sex, and it’s an out-of-this-world, untouchable type of sex, then it turns dark. You can’t see the spark anymore, like a blue flame. It’s difficult to see, but you feel the burn. Even when I attempted to make conversation to see if he would let me in more, he shut me out almost immediately.
There are snippets of him I see, and that’s when I try to get in, but before tonight, it was always in the form of banter, mocking, or bickering. Tonight, there was hope of white flags truly rising and the laying down of armor, but then he built that wall back up.
And this time, regretfully, it hurts me. It doesn’t cause me anger. I feel… sad. Why can’t we just get to know one another? Talk and connect like we do when flesh meets flesh and the sensitive skin becomes a tender thing we treat delicately? Why can’t our words be delicate too?
Who am I kidding? Nico could never. He is a killer. A boss. A ruthless man who has no regard for life except for what it can offer him. And tonight, I choose not to be angry. In fact, it’s like looking into a mirror. Nico wasmadeto be cruel and filled with hate. Just like I was made to think I was nothing to anyone. We are both heirs of the mafia life. There is no escape. You either embrace it or run from it, and we both only had one option. I can’t blame him for how hardened he’s become because of the only life we’ve ever known.
The devil in a power suit is just a naked man with scars no one can heal. Not even me. Who even is he? I’ll never know. Because Nico will give me the cover but nothing under the surface.
I do my best not to think of Nico during the rest of my shower, but I can't help it. He’s all I can think about, and I scold myself. Stepping out, I towel off, put on my nightly moisturizer, brush my teeth, and then make my way into the bedroom to get dressed. I pick out my clothes, but before I can step into them, I’m interrupted by the man I didn't want to think about for the rest of the night.
I swear he must have known.
When I see him, I see exactly what I was ruminating on earlier—I see the devil in the flesh. Nico has transformed into something I have never seen before, an evil that haunts only nightmares.
“Get dressed. We have plans,” he bites out and turns fast on his heel, leaving me in the dust.
“Nico! Where are we going? It's late!” I call after him, scared by the look he just gave me.
Did my father call?
Does Nico know, and now I’m going to die?
My stomach turns, and I feel it bottom out and bile rising to the surface. I feel so much fear in this moment that I don’t even remember how to breathe in and out, and I choke out a cough, gasping for air.
“No.” I continue to grasp onto what feels like brief intervals of oxygen I may not get another chance to take. Dressing in jeans and a white tee with some slip-on Converse happens all in a blur. I don't know how I did it, or recollect any moment of it, but I’m dressed.
On shaky legs, I step out into the hall and make my way to the elevator where I know he will be waiting for me. I didn't even bother to brush my hair or dry it. I just tossed it over my shoulders and tried to get to him before he came looking for me again.
When I see him at the elevator, I take in what he’s wearing. He must have dressed in his office. I know he has a wardrobe in there, because he isn’t in the sweats he was wearing when he left the room. He’s now in shiny pointed shoes and dress pants. His top half is covered in a white button-up that is tucked into his pants, and his sleeves are rolled up to his elbows, his gun holster completing the look. My heart rate continues to rise, never once falling or leveling out. I think I might just have a heart attack.
“Relax, Emelia. You look like you just woke from the dead,” he tells me, and I swallow thickly.
“And you look like you want to kill me.”
He chuckles, and it's menacing.“Far from it, Emelia. Tonight is all about taking care of you and protecting you. So you can take a breath.”
I literally do that. I gasp so loud and bend over, dropping my hands to my knees and sucking in as much air as I can.
“Emelia? What's wrong? Are you all right?” Nico’s voice is worried, and accompanied by his gentle hand on my back, I almost start to cry.
I’ve never been more afraid in my life, and now I have to think up a lie.
“You looked at me like my father always did before he would hurt me. I was worried I upset you somehow,” I say through my panting. And it's not a total lie. I have seen looks almost as painfully terrifying on my father’s face.
“Emelia, breathe, principessa.” He moves the hair that has fallen in my face and kneels down on his haunches. Our eyes lock, and I swear I can see humanity in there.
