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Stavros steps forward with a jab of his hand toward me. “This is where you ran off to? To jump onto Casimir? These two made it sound like you were halfdead.”
I can’t stop myself from glowering at Alek and Benedikt, who are still staring at me in incredulous shock. If I even was half dead in the grips of my magic’s attack, it was only temporary.
“I’m fine,” I snap, drawing myself up taller. I’m not going to let them shame me for an act they’ve no doubt engaged in dozens of times themselves with women who meant less than Casimir means to me. Even if that last bit still has my own shame burning in my chest. “I needed some time alone.”
A guffaw sputters out of Benedikt. “It appears you had good company for that alone time.”
Before I can do more than glare at him, Casimir eases closer to me. “Were you attacked again, Ivy? You didn’t say—”
Shit and smitings, now he’s going to join the judgmental brigade too.
“There was nothing to say,” I cut in. “I’mfine. It was an after-effect of whatever magic was thrown at me before—it wasn’t fun, but it passed.”
Alek speaks up with a strained voice. “You were coughing up blood.”
I make my tone as flippant as I can manage. “Not the first time and it probably won’t be the last. Can we get on to more important things—like what this meeting was supposed to be for?”
They’ve got to be early—Casimir and I weren’t enjoying ourselves forthatlong. I guess they went hunting for me after they realized I’d left Stavros’s quarters and decided to check the archive.
“You’re not invincible,” Stavros growls. “If you care about this mission, you should be looking after yourself, not running around throwing caution to the wind.”
Why, because I might risk my ghostly passenger?
I fold my arms over my chest. “Does that only go for me? I hope to the gods you three weren’t barging around the college together, letting everyone see you’ve been colluding on something.”
Benedikt’s tone turns sharper than usual. “Yes, forgive us for the grave sin of being worried about you.”
“We were careful about it,” Alek adds, even terser than before. “We didn’t forget what matters.”
Is he implying I did?
I hug myself tighter as Stavros looms over me. “Don’t try to turn this around on us. You’re the one who went sneaking off after even more evidence that you’ve become a target, just to get your rocks off.”
Apparently the commotion has been enough to bring Julita back into full consciousness, because her laugh ripples through my thoughts.My goodness. What are they all so worked up about? Upset because you paid a little more attention to Cas than the rest of them? Boys are such boars.
Her mocking tone sets my nerves even more on edge.
I take a step back, my ass bumping the edge of the desk. “Not that it’s any of your business, but I wasn’t planning that. I didn’t even know Casimir would be down here. I just—”
“You just weren’t thinking,” Stavros interrupts in a savage tone. “Clearly. The fate of the entire city—gods, the entire continent—could rest on what we’re doing here, and it turns out you’ll toss that all aside for a roll-about. My expectations were slightly higher than that, even for a street rat.”
“You made a commitment,” Alek adds. “You can’t forget about it whenever you want.”
Julita snorts.Gods above. As if any of them would have listened to me about the problem if they hadn’t been hoping they’d get intomydrawers.
A sour taste creeps through my mouth. “I’ve kept my commitments—which I never even asked for. None of this was my idea!”
Stavros sneers down at me. “No, it was Julita’s. You made a commitment toher. What does she think of you throwing yourself at Casimir instead of staying focused on the mission you came here for? You should listen to her instead of—”
Something in me cracks. I release a broken laugh so harsh Stavros’s voice falters.
This is what it comes down to in the end: no matter what I’ve done, they can’t see me as anything but fringe trash while I’m dying for their fucking cause.
Well, I’m really done now.
“You want to know what Julita thinks?” I say, casting my gaze around at all of them. “She was goading me on, and now she’s laughing at the bunch of you for losing your heads over it. You really have no idea how she actually saw you all, do you?”
Julita’s voice wavers.Ivy? I’m not sure—
