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Blaise.
"She did after she tested my blood and found I had traces of Grim in me." I sit up straight and reach to throw the blanket off me. "Blaise actually heard everything she said, so maybe we should talk about this with him."
I start to get up, but Reece sets a hand on my shoulder and gently guides me back down.
"Allura, you can't get up yet. Not until the cure wears out of your system and your movements return to normal."
"Okay ... Then can you ask him to come in here?" My heart squeezes in my chest as the two of them trade one of their cryptic looks. "What's going on? Where's Blaise?" When neither of them respond, I grow a bit frustrated. Not wanting to come off demanding or annoying, I try to remain patient. "While we were in the Oblivion ... something happened to him. Did something happen to him here, too?"
They exchange another secretive look that nudges me toward the brink of insanity. I want to scream at them to tell me. The uncontrolled reaction frightens me, and I wonder where it stems from. From the Grim blood pumping through my veins?
"Something did happen to him," Ryder finally speaks, covering my hand with his. "Something that's never happened before."
"What was it?" I whisper hoarsely, recalling the time traveler's final words to me.
I wasn't here for you. Well, not completely.
What did he do to Blaise?
Ryder glances at Reece then sits down on the edge of the bed and takes both of my hands in his. "He vanished."
"He what?" Stabbing pain bursts through my chest, and the monitors I'm hooked to react with a series of fitful beeps.
"Allura, you have to calm down." Reece grabs one of my hands from Ryder and gives it a tender squeeze. "Your body's already been under so much stress. And even though you heal faster than an average human, it's still going to take at least a few days before you're completely back to normal."
Nodding, I take one breath after another until the beeping evens out. "I'm sorry. I'm trying to stay calm, but it's just that ..." I inhale through my nose and exhale through my mouth as anxiety starts to get the best of me again. "You said he disappeared; where did he go?"
"Well, we were kind of hoping you could help us figure that out," Ryder says, skimming his thumb along the back of my hand. "You were in there with him; did anything happen where he ... I don't know, just went poof."
I nod, guilt scratching at the inside of my flesh. "Yes, it did."
Ryder lifts one of his hands to my face and cups my cheek. "Can you tell us what happened?"
Hot tears bubble in my eyes. "This is all my fault."
"I doubt that," Ryder says, grazing his thumb along my cheekbone.
My eyelashes uncontrollably flutter, but I lean away as shame scalds my skin. How dare I react to his touch like that while Blaise is lost?
"Maybe you should wait to hear the story before you start making assumptions about whose fault this is."
Ryder sighs, yet a playful glimmer sparkles in his eyes. "Fine. I'll wait until you tell me what happened before I convince you this isn't your fault."
A shaky breath fumbles from my lips, and then I tell them what happened while I was in the Oblivion, starting from when we first arrived all the way up until I saw the copies of Blaise and me watching me. The worst part is that, to explain how I vaguely knew the time traveler, I have to divulge the other memories he made an appearance in, which means confessing that I may have killed someone.
"You saw yourself and Blaise watching Lex carry you into the channels?" Scratching his head, Ryder looks at Reece. "Have you heard of anything like that before?"
"No, but ..." Reece rubs his hand across his jaw, dazing off into empty space. "It could be ..." He drifts from the bed without finishing.
"I hate it when he does that," Ryder mutters with a frown.
"Does what?" I ask, uncertainty weighing on my shoulders.
"Walks off mid-sentence," Ryder replies with an exhausted sigh. "It's like he thinks people can read his mind or something."
"I'm sure he'll come back and tell us what he was going to say."
Ryder rips his focus off Reece. "Yeah, after he paces a hole in the floor."
I turn my head and peer back at Reece, who is pacing the back of the room while yanking his fingers through his hair and muttering under his breath. "Does he talk to himself a lot, too?"
"All the time. But so do I."
I recline back against the propped-up pillow. "I do, too."
"Yeah?" The corner of his lips quirk in a lopsided smile. "Then I guess the three of us were made for each other."
"What about Blaise?" I whisper, staring down at my hands.
He chuckles softly. "I think Blaise might be the worst. He probably talks to himself more than he does anyone else." His laughter dissolves as he sketches a path down my jawline with his fingers then angles my chin up, forcing me to carry his gaze. "What happened in the Oblivion isn't your fault, and I have no idea why you would think that." He pauses. "No, actually I do."
Even though I know he's right, his words are hard to hear. "I know ... And I'm so sorry. I really am. I wish my memories weren't so dangerous. If I'd known, I would've begged Blaise not to go in with me."
"No, you wouldn't have, since you were unconscious when you guys went in there. I'm sure, if you'd been awake, you would've begged him not to go with you even without knowing the dangers." He releases a heavyhearted sigh as I stare at him in puzzlement. "I think you misunderstood what I was saying. I didn't mean that I understood why you were blaming yourself because I thought it was your fault. I just know you're the kind of person who would blame themselves."
I shake my head, causing one of the wires to fall off my head. "I don't think that's true."
"Of course you don't." He leans over me to pick up the fallen wire, reattaching it to my temple. "I don't know if this will upset you or not, but I think I'm going to say it, anyway, because it needs to be said." He rests a hand on either side of my shoulders and levels his gaze with mine. "I think, all that time you spent in the cell, getting"--a shaky breath eases from his lips--"abused, might have messed up your self-confidence."
"No, I don't think that's it." Is it?
Pity fills his eyes. "It might take some time, but one day, I'm going to convince you that's true, and that you're better than you think you are."
"Ryder ..." I start, wishing I could believe him and knowing I can't, not when I don't know what I am. "You heard everything I told you, right? About what the time traveler said to me?"
He waves me off dismissively. "I don't really care about that."
"Really?"
"Yes, really. I mean, seriously, this guy just shows up out of nowhere and declares he's a time traveler--whatever that is--and that he knows you. And we're, what? Just supposed to believe him?"
"I don't know." I scratch the back of my neck. "He seemed to know things about me. Like how I can't die."
"Actually, you can." He scoots closer and the mattress concaves with his weight. "If we hadn't put you in the Oblivion, the Kiss of Death would've killed you."
"Oh." My thoughts ravel into a jumble of confusion. "Then why
did I die when I was shot ...? And in the memories when the guy killed me ... he said I always come back to life."
He threads his fingers through mine again, something he's done at least five times since I came back. "Reece isn't sure yet, but I know he's been looking into this."
"I've actually come up with a few theories." Reece moves up beside my bed, his hair sticking up all over the place. "One being that the Kiss of Death was made by the Grim to injure the Grim. But since you're not entirely Grim, it can kill you, just like it would kill one of us."
My lips form an O. "So, the Grim can kill me if they want to?"
"I think so." He sinks down onto the bed. "I don't think they were trying to kill you, though."
"You don't?" Ryder questions with a crook of his brow. "It sure looked like that's what they were trying to do."
Reece shakes his head. "I think, if they would've gotten ahold of her, they would've administered the cure."
"They have a cure, too?" I ask, rubbing my hands up and down my arms as goose bumps sprout across my flesh.
I almost died. I can die. Whether it makes me sick or not, I find a little reassurance in knowing that.
Reece's eyes glint mischievously. "Where do you think I got the instructions for the cure?"
A spurt of dizziness overcomes me as I gape at him. "You stole them from the Grim?"
Reece nods. "There's a place in the city where the Grim keep all of their little files and books about their history. And they keep some stuff on computers. I've never actually been able to hack into that particular system before now, but apparently, with the right motivation ..." He shrugs.
"He means you being on the verge of death," Ryder clarifies as he picks up the cup of water on the table next to my bed and hands it to me. "Now drink up. You look like you're about to pass out."
Offering him a small, grateful smile, I take the cup and down another full glass of cold water. The icy cold temperature causes my body to convulse with shivers.
Wiping my mouth with the back of my hand, I return the cup to Ryder. "So, now what do we do? I mean, how do we get Blaise back?"
Ryder and Reece exchange yet another undecipherable look then simultaneously stand up from the bed.
