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The huge man suddenly steps forward, sticking his hand out.
“Marshall T–Taylor,” he says with a huge grin.
“Hi, Marshall,” I say, jolted back to life. I manage to maneuver the fern into my left hand and reach out to shake his. “I’m Emile. A pleasure to meet you.”
Marshall grabs my hand in his enormous bear paw, squeezing so hard and pumping so vigorously that I’m sure my hand, if not my whole arm, is about to be lost. I just barely avoid dropping the fern entirely.
When he finally lets go, Clarissa speaks up again. “Marshall pops in from time to time,” she says by way of explanation. “Now that I’m settled down, it’s nice to have some family around.”
“Oh, I thought you didn’t have any family here,” I say, trying to piece together the little I know about Clarissa.
“Oh, well, I didn’t until now,” Clarissa says quickly. “Marshall just moved over from –”
“Australia,” Marshall jumps in with an excited grin. “I’ve been living there for the last ten years, but the spiders got to be a little too much.”
The big man suddenly guffaws at this, as if it’s the funniest thing he’s heard in a long time. I can’t help but chuckle along with him, even if I don’t really get the joke.
“Crazy country. I don’t know how I even survived and came back to tell the tale. Did you know Australia is home to eight of the ten most venomous snakes in the world?” Marshall says once he’s recovered from his joke.
He suddenly appears incredibly serious, and I look to Clarissa for a cue on how to respond. Unfortunately, she’s busy staring directly at her shoes.
“Oh, I didn’t know that, no,” I reply with sincerity. “That must have been… challenging?”
I’m still not really sure what this conversation is, but I don’t want to be rude. He’s polite enough, just a bit disorienting. Besides, he’s Clarissa’s family. I should be nice.
“Oh, yeah, mate,” he says, slipping inexplicably into a bad Australian accent. “I once came upon a death adder in the wild,” he says, broadening his vowels in a way that makes my head hurt. “Nearly bit my leg clean off!”
“Well, Marshall,” jumps in Clarissa. “It was really nice to see you.”
“Oh, okay,” Marshall replies, evidently a little disappointed at being interrupted. I get the feeling he’s even more disappointed neither of us complimented his Australian accent.
Luckily though, he relents as Clarissa gently ushers him to the porch stairs and the big man slowly gets the message.
“Well, nice to meet you, Emile!” he says, back in his American accent.
I silently breathe a sigh of relief. “You, too!” I call to him, waving.
Once he seems to be on his way, Clarissa turns back to me with a sigh.
“Sorry about that,” she says, clearly embarrassed. “He’s well-meaning but he can be a bit much.”
“No problem,” I say. “He’s an interesting character.”
“That’s for sure,” Clarissa replies, looking after Marshall as he climbs in his car and drives off.
“Well, we can’t choose our family, right?” I say with a slight grin.
Clarissa laughs a little at this, but all I can think about is the wave of relief that washed over me the moment Clarissa said the word ‘cousin.’ Was I really so worried that she might have a boyfriend?
Apparently. Even though I’ve spent more than a week now convincing myself not to be. Guess I’m not doing that good of a job of it.
I realize then that Clarissa is looking at me, and that I’m still clutching a giant maidenhair fern that I’ve yet to explain.
“Oh, I got you this,” I say, with the practiced casualness of a friendly neighbor. “For your bathroom.”
I smile, hoping again the gift will be well-received. To my relief, Clarissa’s eyes light up.
“Oh wow, thank you,” she says, gazing lovingly at the fern. “I love maidenhair ferns. They’re my favorites, actually.”
