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“Don’t fear it. Let it happen. I don’t give a shit how long it takes or how uncontrollable it is. I need you to love me.”
“I need you to love me.” “Need you.” “Love me.” “I need you.” “To love me.”
“I need you to love me.”
“What?” When he doesn’t reply, I push his hands away and grab his face through my tears. “What?”
“I need you to feel the way I do.” He pulls me into him. “I need you to know that. Think whatever the hell you want about our relationship as long as you know that, below the addiction, there’s a whole bunch of fucking emotion, all right?”
I inhale sharply, holding the breath until it fucking burns me.
“No.”
“Yes,” he says sharply. “Yes. I won’t say it because you can’t deal with it right now, but it’s there. Ever since you told me never to touch you and threw my money back at me. It’s been there. Growing.”
“No,” I repeat, feeling smaller and smaller.
“Come here.” Tyler pulls me down and wraps me into his body so hard that I can’t escape.
I’m trapped. I’m tied in yet another way by this man, unable to free myself from his unrelenting binds.
“Don’t say it,” I beg, pushing my face into him. “Please. Just…don’t say it.”
A shudder racks his whole body. “I promise I won’t. Not until you want me to.”
You get me, I think. I don’t know how it’s possible, but he fucking gets me. Gets that I need to know it but not hear it.
I need to know that he feels the way I do.
In this second, it doesn’t matter that the length of us is undefined. It doesn’t matter about the demons we fight or the bumps ahead.
It just matters that, in the space of seconds—mere, seemingly inconsequential seconds—I’ve both admitted to myself and accepted that Tyler and I are falling in love.
Very, very quickly.
I open my eyes and stare straight at a mug of coffee with a backdrop of abs. Well, that’s one way to start a day.
I stare longingly, undecided if it’s the abs or the coffee making me sigh happily, and drag my gaze upward to smirking lips. My eyes find the dark-brown ones of my dirty British boy, and this time, my sigh is definitely for him.
“Good morning.” Amusement filters through his words.
“Morning.” I smile lazily and sit up. “Is that for me?”
“The abs or the coffee?”
“Hilarious.” I reach out and grab the mug.
He laughs and perches on the edge of the bed. “What are you doing today?”
“I’m meeting Day at the new bar. We’re coming up with the final cocktail menu so I can order everything from the supplier this afternoon.” I sip my coffee. “The fridges and stuff were installed yesterday, and since it opens in, like, two weeks, we really need to get moving.”
“You could have told Aaron he’s expecting too much, you realize?”
I stop my lips from twitching. “One of the builders tried that. It didn’t go well.”
“Good point.” Tyler leans back and gazes up at me. “Interviewing any hot cocktail-shaker guys yet?”
“Not yet,” I say nonchalantly into my mug. “I was going to set up interviews this weekend. Do you know I required pictures with the applications?”
