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There’s a snigger as the group listens with amusement as Theron and Gabe begin to show their humorous sides. “We’ve got this sausage calledPastourma…you can guess where the conversion goes whenever the family is grilling that on the barbecue.”
“Do they ever talk about anything else?” Stefan jokes.
“Yeah. Mostly about how much weight everyone’s gained or lost. Or about how much money people have or don’t have. And about who’s got the bigger house and the more expensive car.”
“They sound like they’re obsessed with the size of everything,” I say, wishing I could meet Theron and Gabe’s crazy family.
“Kind of.”
I run my hand through the water, splashing some onto my thighs that are getting a little pink from the sun. “Another question,” I say. “How many women have had a problem with your size?”
“I had one relationship that broke down because of it,” Tom says. “She had a general problem with sex, though. I think my big dick was just the last straw.”
“What was the problem?” Oliver asks, with concern lining his expression.
“She’s had some bad experiences in the past. It caused a condition. I tried to help her through it, but it became too much of an issue in her mind. She used to look at my dick with real fear in her eyes.”
“That would be a boner killer.” Jimmy’s usual joking tone is reduced to something softer and more empathetic.
“Yeah,” Tom says sadly. “It was. But there’s more to relationships than sex. I just wanted to make her happy, and I was confident things would have gotten better over time. She just had too much of a hangup about it.”
“I’ve had women ban us from fucking in certain positions because my dick hits too deep,” Gabe says. As he confesses, he cups his fisted right hand in his giant left palm, crunching his knuckles.
“Yeah, doggy can be fucked up,” Jonas says.
“It’s hard to control the depth,” Carson says. “Especially when you’re getting close.”
“And losing control,” Clay adds.
“Exactly,” Jimmy agrees.
And as they talk more about sex and positions, my mind drifts to a place where I don’t have to be sensible and professional. Where my life hasn’t been driven by financial pressure to be successful, and I can relax enough to have experiences like these men, and the women in their tales. My mind becomes filled with forbidden images of them over me and under me and behind me, filling me with cocks so big, they make my eyes water and my body convulse with pleasure.
I might still be a virgin, but I have a vivid imagination.
They fuel my filthy thoughts with their sparkling eyes and tanned skin, their big biceps, and broad chests. They fuel them with their huge hands and abs that stretch like ladders down to places made for sin. They make me think such debauched things that I feel like a hypocrite for being mad at the delivery driver. As I try to fan away a hot flush with my hand, all I can think is thank goodness I’m recording this conversation because I’m so lost in my own fantasies that I’ve missed out on information that could be crucial to building my article. I can only hope my blood-tinged skin doesn’t give it all away.
CARSON
I’m not sure how I’m nominated to cook on the first night we’re together, but that’s what’s happening. My mistake for talking about all things food with Russell after the barbecue feast he prepared for us. My Thai Green curry recipe must have tickled his taste buds enough to mention it to a few others in the group.
As I prepare the ingredients, the air in the kitchen is filled with anticipation. Allie is pretending not to watch me, her attention focused on her phone, but I feel her gaze drifting over every so often. She is an intriguing mix of confident and tentative. It’s like she has belief in herself up until the point she hears the whisper of doubt in her ears. In truth, she reminds me a little of myself.
Jimmy, Theron, and Gabe stand around the island, watching me with interest, or maybe it’s to assess the competition. Jimmy leans closer, peering at the ingredients. "You sure you can handle the heat, Carson? There are a lot of hungry people in this place expecting something amazing to eat."
“No pressure then.” I hold up a chili pepper. “I’m good with heat. What about you?”
“I kick heat in the ass,” he laughs. I believe that. After Allie paused the interviews by the pool, she left us to retreat inside. That’s when the bro talk started, and Jimmy shared his MMA background. The guy could kick the butts of every man in here. Maybe all of us at the same time!
When I initially found out there were ten of us involved in this study, I was prepared to meet a load of guys beating their chests for dominance. Put any group of men together and they size each other up, trying to work out where they fit in the hierarchy.
But this group has been different from the start, and I can’t work out why.
I mean, we’re all good looking in our own ways. There isn’t a man here who doesn’t put time in at the gym or hone his body with some other kind of physical exertion. We’re all from different professions and have different financial situations. But everyone here seems on an equal playing field. Yes, there’s some good-natured teasing, but I haven’t once felt like anyone was out to put others down for their own gain.
I guess it could be because we’re here for a week and everyone is focusing on relaxing and enjoying themselves as much as they can. It could be because the only woman here is off limits because of her need to keep a professional distance. I’ve considered a more amusing reason; the fact that we have identical dick lengths and so there’s no cock-competition amongst us. An anthropologist could have a field day with this.
“Carson’s an artist,” Allie says. “And that’s a good thing because getting the balance of flavors right in a Thai Green Curry is the most important thing, not the heat.”
