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I push on his chest and move to sit up. “You’re so immature. I get now what your mom must have gone through with your childhood antics.”
He swallows hard and just stares. Unfortunately, my reference to his mom and his childhood did nothing to distract me from other, more forbidden thoughts.
I want Oliver in my life now, and in a much deeper way than ever before.
“Okay, our clothing can stay where it is.” But he tugs me closer, and I hear him whisper under his breath something like, “Thatwouldbe a dream.”
“What did you say?” I ask.
He gazes at me. “Nothing, Sophie.” And he settles into the sand a bit more, only moving to dislodge a couple of rocks underneath him.
I face away from him and scoot back until I’m against his chest. He rubs my arms, bringing life back into them. We sit like that for a long while, watching the three black ibis dig in the sand only a few yards away.
We should probably get back in the boat now and return to the resort, but I can’t bring myself to suggest it. My back up against his chest is life right now.
There’s no need to talk about anything at all. We just sit. Waiting for what’s left of the sunlight to dry us out. Waiting for me to have courage.
For what, I do not know.
Finally, half my body is tingly, and I move to stand.
I pull him up with me, and we’re face to face. His gaze pours over me, filled with so much that I can’t understand.
That Wim Hoff thing might be wearing off because my head starts to pound dully. Except it doesn’t take with it the insane notion that Oliver and I could be together for real. Not the pretend thing at closing night. But something deep and honest.
I don’t want to go back to my safe hamster ball. I want to live in this feeling.
“I can’t believe you fell in,” he whispers in my hair.
“Neither can I.” Embarrassment colors my laugh. “I guess it’s only fair. You’d polar plunged without me—for no reason it turned out—I guess karma came around in a swift way.”
“Where’s your bracelet now?”
A giggle bursts out of me. “I have no idea.”
He shakes his head. “I have to admit, I don’t care about it anymore.”
“You shouldn’t. It’s probably from Walmart.” I tilt my head back so I can better see him.
He scrunches up his nose, and I laugh. Then he grows serious. He tugs my waist closer to him again. His expression dares me to kiss him.
Chapter 12
Oliver
I’m going to kiss Sophie Lawson.
Something close to rage fills me.
No. It’s not rage. I’m not angry about it, it’s just the pent-up, dissociated feelings of roughly seventeen years of loving her and being too dumb to notice.
I’m claiming her hips with my hands. I’m on a mission and I’m mad that it’s taken me so long to wake up to it. I glance down at her mouth and wonder what it will be like.
My brain zips down a dangerous memory lane: I saw her when she was getting out of the water and her dress was hiked way up. But I couldn’t disrespect her by lingering. So, I dunked back in the water and found the painter so I could guide the boat to shore.
It was a good thing she’d righted her dress by the time I came back up. I don’t want her to feel embarrassed, which she would if she knew what I saw.
But the memory of that will forever be etched in my brain somewhere in the file labeled “Wonders of the World, or How I Discovered the Mind-bending Beauty of Sophie Lawson.”
