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“Jaded.” Alec nods. “Like me?”
“Yeah.” I laugh, but he’s not exactly wrong. “I know your type. Injured athlete and all that.”
Brandt, with his floppy blonde hair and a physique he was overly proud of, comes to mind.
“You don’t know everything about me.” His voice is playful, residual from this afternoon. But there’s a shadow over his countenance that also reminds me of Brandt.
I take a step back. “You’re right. But I’ve seen it enough to know there’s probably a lot of stuff to unpack in that head of yours. Not saying it’s any of my business.” My gaze goes to the floor before returning to his. “Look, I’ll be honest with you. Brandt had his football career cut short. His injury happened in college, before I met him. He had all this…stuff to prove, and he was a major headcase. I don’t blame him because he wanted to be out on the field. I get it. But the anger? It consumed him and I wasn’t even fully aware of that until it was too late.”
Alec’s jaw hardens. “Too late? That sounds…bad.”
“It was pretty bad.” I offer a laugh, but it dies quickly. “He wasn’t great at dealing with his grief over not being a football star. And don’t even get me started on his dad’s disappointment. He’s one of the owners of the Wolves, so he was still pretty ticked off that his son wasn’t playing, that he was stuck in an office job. Anyway, Brandt hadn’t dealt with his problems, and he hid that fact from me.” My mouth dries up. “There was a lot going on that I didn’t know about. It was pretty ugly.”
“I never liked Brandt Bordy. Entitled—” Alec curses with a snort. “Did he hurt you? I mean, he didn’t…hurt you, did he?”
I stare at him, and his blue eyes are softened with a kind agony. I shake my head. “No. Not physically. He has a temper and he lies. The gaslighting to make me feel like our problems were all my fault…” I trail off. “I should have never gotten involved with him in the first place. We worked together.”
“And he was a former athlete.” Alec swallows and turns to the refrigerator.
I join him. “Looking for more chocolate milk?”
He chuckles. “Maybe.”
I hover near him, wanting to place an arm around him. His back is straight, and he doesn’t meld into me. “You remember when we talked about nothing physical in the house?”
“I remember how you shot me down,” he says.
I give a little laugh. “Sorry. I didn’t know you then.”
“You’re getting to know me now.” He rotates to face me, draping his toned arm on the door of the fridge.
“Yes,” I say, but part of me gets hung up. I don’t know him, not enough. I thought I knew Brandt, and could believe the funny and happy demeanor. But he was in poser mode the whole time, and I only fully saw his ugliness after he'd taken most of my money.
“I wanted to kiss you today.” I’m trying to stop my smiling, but it’s there and in charge.
“You did?” He’s smiling, too and he closes the refrigerator, turning to fully face me.
“I know you did, too,” I tease.
He steps towards me, his body so near I could wrap my arms around him in a hug. But he’s not touching me. It’s torture. “Yes, I did want to kiss you, Oakley.” His eyes soften. “And I’ll respect your rule for nothing physical in the house.”
“My rule? That was yours, remember? Besides…” His citrus, clean scent is taking over the rest of my senses. I motion between us with my fingers. “This isn’t physical?” I challenge. With the way my heart is pounding, it most certainly is.
Alec’s chuckle reverberates through his chest and we’re standing so closely I can almost feel the vibrations through mine. “This? Oh, this is on a whole other level of physical.” His voice is low—dark. I feel his breath at my temple, the heat of the length of him singeing me senseless. Still, we’re not touching. “Being this close to you is wrecking me, Oakley.”
My cheeks flood with warmth. I try not to gasp, but I do. So I cover it up with something that sounds like a cross between a hiccup and a sob.
Easing back and away from me, Alec lets go of our almost hug—our almost kiss. It feels like he’s a mile away from me already. “I’ll respect our decision to not touch here in this house.” His swallow is hard.
I lick my lips and nod quickly, my gaze not leaving his.
“Woman,” he growls, his expression ripping from mine and going to the floor. He lets out a hot breath and widens his stance, his hands low on his hips. “You are incredibly beautiful. When you look at me like that, I—.”
I cover my face with my hands. “Alec. I don’t know what I’m doing to—”
He puts up a palm. “Let’s finish this conversation in the living room.” He pushes his fingers through his hair and walks to the sofa. Motioning to the one across from it, he says. “Sit there.”
I do, and neither of us says anything for a while. The heat in my cheeks starts to ease. “We probably shouldn’t touch in the gym, either,” I offer, only because I know it’s for the best. “It was unprofessional of me to kiss your forearms like that, and if someone had walked in—"
