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Alone.
So, so alone.
He’s...gone.
The pain was different now.
Heavy as a mountain.
Colder than an iceberg.
A landslide covered me, burying me beneath sludge and stone.
A tomb.
A cache.
A blissful, blotting ending.
I sighed into it.
I was swept away.
And the final thing I heard was a worried doctor’s question. “Did you know? Did you know she’s pregnant?”
Lights snuffed out.
Darkness bloomed.
I let go.
Chapter Thirty-Three
*
Nerida
*
(Love in Dutch: Liefde)
TEARS DRIPPED SILENTLY DOWN MY CHEEKS. MY head pounded with a familiar headache. A headache that I’d often suffered ever since that horrendous night.
I trembled where I sat, sinking into the present moment and leaving the past behind. I stiffened as I noticed my fingers linked ever so tightly with Dylan’s.
He sat braced beside me, his gaze full of pity, our palms sweaty where we gripped.
My chin tipped upward as I glanced at Margot. She didn’t speak where she sat opposite me. Wetness tracked down her cheeks as she shook her head. Over and over again.
Wiping at her tears, she breathed, “He died? Truly? He’s dead?”
I flinched and pulled my hand from Dylan’s.
The conservatory with its pretty palms and lush greenery mocked me with vibrant life, all while I hovered in the death that I’d begged for so often when I was twenty.
I looked back now and pitied that girl so much. I was embarrassed by her and sad for her. I’d hated her and cursed her. But most of all, I was thankful that she’d survived. Against all her wishes to die. Despite all her despair and remorse and the insidious voices in her head to end it, she was strong enough to stay alive.
Without him.
