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The huge scar on my left forearm was the only remnant I had that I’d once felt something for her and inked myself with something to remember her by.
Fluttering her ridiculously thick lashes, the girl undid the buttons of my blazer and inserted her bold hands inside. Her touch was cool as she ran her fingers up my chest and over my shoulders, pushing the jacket away.
I didn’t move.
I never moved when someone touched me.
I’d learned that lesson well.
I stood as still as a statue as she tugged the jacket off my wrists, stole my cane just long enough to remove the blazer entirely, then pressed the carved lion’s head back into my palm.
Fisting it, I struggled to breathe as she repeated the process with my black shirt.
She took her time with the buttons.
She undid them torturously slowly.
I twitched and waited, trained to expect far worse.
When she had me standing bare chested before her, her eyes tightened as she looked upon all my scars.
I kept my gaze far away from the mirror.
I couldn’t look.
Couldn’t see.
I wanted her to stop.
I wanted to be left alone.
But I had no say. I never had any say in the torture I’d been given.
And this was just another level of torture, wrapped up in beauty, delivered with softness, all while I waited for the agony I knew would come.
In a cloud of floral perfume, she swayed forward, pressed a kiss to one of the many scars on my chest, then her hands went to my waistband. She unbuttoned and unzipped me; she sucked in a breath as my slacks fell to the floor.
Cool air licked around my legs. My skin prickled, my hair stood on end, and the agonising phantom pain that was far worse than any session in the machine ripped my eyes to the mirror.
I couldn’t help it.
I couldn’t stop myself.
The moment my gaze landed on my disfigured form, I lost the numbness he’d drowned me in.
A surge of absolute fury.
A crest of murderous rage.
I remembered.
Fuck, I remember—
“Get out,” I breathed coldly, deadly.
The girl backed away, her delicate hands folded in her scarves. “But I’m your present, efendim. I am yours to do with as you wish.”
I couldn’t look away from the ruination of my body.
