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I force myself upright and swing my legs off the bed and stretch out my tired limbs. Taking a deep breath, I walk over to the closet and pull out some fresh clothing to change into before heading down to start my day.
My hands claw at my shirt, tugging it over my head with a desperate need to forget, but everywhere I turn, the ghost of my lost love permeates the atmosphere, taunting me with memories and mocking me with her absence. Inevitably, my mind turns to my mom, her death so sudden and unjust that I’m forced to grapple with a reality incomprehensible in its cruelty. The memory of her opening her eyes, and the spark of hope that filled me up, only to be snuffed out a second later when her eyes closed and her heart stopped, keeps swirling around in my head.
Why is life so cruel? Why do the people I love die?What have I done to deserve this?My thoughts wander through each memory, every moment with my mom and dad forever imprinted on my mind. My sentiment drifts back to my beautiful Brownie. No, she’s not mine anymore. I know ending it was the right decision, for a life with me would never allow her motherhood. The thought of creating a child and risking them to live and possibly die is more than I can bear.How can any man live with that kind of burden?
Okay, time to stop my marathon thoughts and try to do something productive before heading to Six-Pack. My eyes fall on my TV and I decide it’s time to purchase a new television and use it to fill my endless restlessness with Netflix binges.
It’s almostnoon when I pull up to the barista shop to grab an espresso. As I get in line outside the store, my eyes flick across my phone’s messages—but something in the building’s corner next to this one catches my attention and holds it there. A young boy stands alone, his hand running through his jet-black hair like a comb as he anxiously scans his surroundings. When our eyes meet, he abruptly throws his gaze away, hiding his trembling fingers in his coat pockets. He soon resumes his searching movements, but when he doesn’t find what he was searching for, the trembling of his bottom lip betrays his disappointment. Without a second thought, I step away from the queue and approach him.
“Hi,” I greet in a gentle tone.
He looks up.
“Are you lost?”
He nods but says nothing.
“Who did you lose?” I inquire further.
“My parents and my little sister,” he whispers.
“Where did you last see them?”
He shrugs and looks around again.
“Do you remember where you were when you lost them?”
“In a boring store.”
I chuckle, then ask, “Do you know the name of the shop? Maybe we could go there?”
“My mom and dad told me never to go anywhere with a stranger,” he mumbles.
I rub the back of my neck. “Well, they’re right. You shouldn’t.” I contemplate what to do next. “How about if I stay here until they come to find you?”
He nods, his eyes still searching the crowd.
“I’m Brian, by the way. Want to tell me yours?”
“Nathan,” he almost whispers, still focused on the mass of shoppers in front of us.
“Nice to meet you, Nathan.”
Minutes drift by, and we both observe the throng of people when a man suddenly cries out the boy’s name. Nathan’s eyes widen seeing the man with a striking resemblance stride toward us. He takes Nathan in his arms and embraces him tightly. The man crouches and seizes the child’s shoulders.
“What was going through your head, Nathan? Mom asked you to wait at the entrance of the store.” His gaze shoots up to me; I hold up my palms.
“No bad intentions here. I was waiting in line at the coffee shop when I noticed him standing here alone. He told me he had lost you all, so I offered to help look for you, but he mentioned his parents had said never to leave with strangers.”
The father grins warmly at his son.
“So instead, I waited with him until you showed up.”
The man stands and extends his hand. “Thank you.”
I grip it and reply, “No problem.”
“Nathan!” A lady pushing a stroller runs over and clutches the boy in her arms, murmuring something into his ear before kissing him on top of his head. When she smooths her sleek straight ebony locks off her forehead as she rises straight again, I recognize her.
