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The muscle in his jaw pulses and his brows draw together in a frown. “We should’ve gotten to you sooner.”
“Why didn’t you?” she bursts out, her hand flying to cover her mouth, wishing she could suck the words back in.
Matt stiffens, his countenance pales, and a pained expression crosses his face.
“I’m so sorry, Matt. I didn’t mean that,” she pleads, reaching out toward him. “I’m angry—no, I’m fucking furious at Vance. Forgive me. I didn’t mean to take it out on you.”
Emotions threaten to choke her, and she painfully swallows before she continues, “I fuckinghatehim. I know we all have a claim, but if I get a chance, I’m calling First Rights.” She drops her outstretched arms loosely beside her. Grim satisfaction courses through her as she envisions all of the ways she wants to end Vance’s life.
Matt nods. “We all want a piece of him.” He goes to the door, rests his hand on the handle, and turns his head in her direction. “One more thing. I know you’re angry, but Gage and his crew risked their lives on that rescue mission. They didn’t have to come here to help us. They could’ve stayed in the shadows and lived their life in peace.” He lets out a sigh. “You might want to cut him some slack.”
Matt leaves, and the quiet snick of the door closing on his words gives her pause. Is she being unreasonable by lashing out at everyone? Is it unfair that she’s hurting people who care about her? Probably, but anger and pain don’t always see reason.
Her panther raises its head and steps close to the surface, sending soothing warmth through her.Your intentions are good, but time is what I need to heal,she sends back. The animal growls and pushes harder at her. Images of Lilly in the cages at the facility as a child, the arduous trek through the woods to freedom, and the gruelling long days of building her store all flash through her mind.Okay, okay. I get it.We’re stronger than what life has thrown at us.Her panther chuffs out an indignant sound, then curls back down and quiets.
She throws herself back on her pillows with a frustrated sigh. With a roll of her eyes, she whips the blankets off herself and gets out of bed. Her hand immediately goes to her forehead as a small wave of dizziness hits. Pausing to catch her bearings, she waits until it passes before she heads to the bathroom.
Flicking on the light, she is surprised at her reflection. Her long black hair hangs straight, definitely in need of a wash, but someone has brushed out the tangles.
Leaning closer to the mirror, she brushes a finger over her cheek. Her wide teal blue cat-like eyes stand out starkly from her pale skin. Hints of bruising still colour her face with their light yellow and blue hues.
She flexes her hand, finding her fingers stiff but without pain. Lilly hastily removes her clothes and turns this way and that, checking herself in the large bathroom mirror. Her athletic build is peppered with dirt, blood, and bruises in various stages of healing. She puts her whole weight on her leg and then stretches it out. Only a slight twinge of pain remains.
How long have I been out?
She makes a mental note to ask Matt before she turns and opens the shower door. She sets the temperature to just below boiling and steps in under the scalding spray.
Lathering her long hair with shampoo, her mind wanders to Gage. His likeness to Maverick was jarring at first, but the subtle differences were there. Where Mav’s eyes had been teal blue, Gage’s are forest green, framed by long thick black lashes. And that slight nick on his chin? Remnants of a childhood wound, perhaps? Shaking her head, she rinses out the suds then grabs the conditioner.
Once she’s satisfied that she has washed every speck of flesh Vance could have touched, she turns off the shower and dries off. The towel is rough against her tender skin… like Gage’s hand. She shivers but not from being cold. He’s attractive, of that there’s no doubt, but looks aren’t everything. Good character, a sense of humour, honour, and integrity are the traits that make her tingly.
Padding across the hardwood floor of her bedroom, Lilly opens her dresser drawer and pulls out a tank top, bra, underwear, and a pair of cut-off jean shorts. She slides her cotton panties up her long legs, then reaches for her bra and puts it on. Her full, high breasts overflow the cups as per usual. Finding a bra that fits properly post-nuclear apocalypse is a luxury that few get to have.Thank God we have a great seamstress. Once dressed, she slips on a pair of flats and runs a brush through her wet hair, tying it back in a high pony.
With a cursory glance in the mirror above her dresser, she straightens her shoulders and heads out the door, her mind focused on tracking down Gage.
Chapter eleven
Thetwentyminutewalkfrom her home to the main street gives Lilly time to reflect on her earlier behaviour with both Matt and Gage. She was being unfair, but her anger at what happened to her and her people is still so fresh, bubbling just under the surface.
Guilt rears its ugly head as she turns the corner onto the main street. She tries to shake it off but loses the battle. She may be healing physically, but emotionally, not so much. The roads are clear of debris, and there are tables set up in front of her shop where a group of people are working with the various wildflowers that are laid out. Both familiar faces and new ones stand shoulder to shoulder, their fingers a blur as they weave the flowers into ceremonial bouquets.
A lump forms in her throat. The last time flowers were prepared, they were for… Mav’s ceremony.Was that only a few weeks ago?
She shakes her head. So much has happened since then—a lifetime. Peering down the street, Matt and Gage are standing by the diner. Lilly breathes out a resigned sigh and approaches them.
Both men look her way as she walks up and stands next to them. Matt gives her a quick grin while Gage stiffens. Not that she can blame him, since she was a bit of a bitch the last time they were face to face.
“Hey. I, uh, wanted to apologize for earlier,” she says, shoving her hands in her back pockets as she toes the ground with her shoe, focusing anywhere but on the two men.
Gage is the first to speak. When she looks up, his eyes capture hers, and his voice is a rich timbre as he says, “You went through hell. Your anger was justified, albeit misplaced.” His words could be misinterpreted as a censure if not for the fact that his tone is gentle and sincere.
Lilly blinks, a little taken aback at his quick forgiveness, but she nods and turns her attention to Matt. “They’re preparing for the ceremony,” she states, gesturing to the people down the street.
“Yeah, we’re holding it at sunset,” he says, his gaze on the workers weaving flowers.
“It’s… nice,” Lilly says eventually, nodding toward where the Homani are intermingled with the clones.
“What’s nice?” Gage asks as his brows form together.
