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"Tony?" I ventured, my voice shaky.
His eyes once again met mine, and I was taken aback by the look in them. It was devoid of the desire he'd shown at the cabin or during our sleepover. The look was different, deeper, and I wasn't quite sure what it meant.
The light from the living room lamp threw long shadows across his face, making his expression even more mysterious. "Jude," he said, his voice heavy with something I couldn't quite decipher.
He let out a deep breath and continued, "I owe you an apology. For the way I acted the other night, walking out like that. And for the way I acted at work. I was being an ass. I'm sorry."
I nodded, acknowledging his apology. It was nice to hear him admit his mistake, but it didn't really change anything. We were still at a standstill, both wanting different things. I needed to make sure he understood that.
"I appreciate your apology," I began, maintaining eye contact with him. "But I have to be clear about something. I'm not interested in being a booty call, if that's what you have in mind. I'm too old for that kind of thing.”
The words hung in the air, causing a shift between us.
The sudden laughter that escaped from Tony took me by surprise. I felt my brows furrow in confusion. "What's so funny?" I asked, unable to hide the curiosity in my voice.
He shook his head, his laughter subsiding to chuckles. "I don't know," he admitted, grinning at me. "Just something about you saying ‘booty call’ is funny."
Part of me wanted to scold him, to tell him this was a serious conversation. But instead, his laughter was infectious, and I found myself chuckling along with him. Despite the intensity of the situation, Tony always knew how to lighten the mood. It was one of the things I admired about him, even though his supercilious attitude could annoy me at times, as if it were a way for him to stay detached from any situation that threatened to become too deep, too real.
His laughter died down, and his eyes softened as he looked at me. The amusement in his gaze was replaced by a sincerity that made my breath hitch. "I'd be lying if I said I wasn't thinking that at first," he admitted, and my heart sank a little. "But now, I can't stop thinking about you, Jude. And I think I want more."
The word 'think' caused a weird flip in my stomach. It was too uncertain, too tentative. I tried to push aside the doubts gnawing at me, but it was impossible.
"Youthinkyou want more?”
He stepped closer. “No, that’s not what I meant. I don’t think, Iknow.”
The certainty in his voice was enough to give me pause, to make my heart skip a beat with excitement.
"Well if you're sure you want to try, then I'd like that too."
The relief that flashed across his face was enough to make me forget my reservations. We took a step toward each other, and in that moment, everything else seemed to blur into insignificance. I felt a new kind of spark, a sense of rightness that I hadn't felt before. And for the first time in a long while, I felt a glimmer of hope for what lay ahead.
The world around us seemed to quiet, leaving only the sounds of our breathing and the steady thumping of my heart in my ears. His gaze was heavy, anchored in the swirling emotions reflected in his eyes. I felt like I was standing on the edge of a precipice, ready to leap into the unknown.
A part of me screamed for caution, reminding me of the heartache and pain that could result. But a louder part, the part of me that had been longing for this, was shouting down the voices of reason. I didn't want to stop, didn't want to think about the consequences. In that moment, all I wanted was Tony.
Our lips met with an intensity that stole my breath. The kiss was passionate, filled with a desperate need, as if we were trying to convey all of our unsaid emotions through that single act. His hands were on my waist, pulling me closer, while mine found their way into his hair, anchoring him to me.
When we finally broke apart, gasping for breath, I saw a mirror of my own feelings reflected in Tony's eyes. They held a raw honesty that made my heart clench. We had crossed that line, and just as I’d thought, there was no going back. And to my own surprise, I found that I wouldn't have it any other way.
Chapter 24
Tony
The kiss rocked me to my core, setting my senses ablaze. It wasn't just the physical aspect of it, though that was certainly overwhelming. It was the tidal wave of emotion, a mixture of desire, longing, fear, and something else... something deeper I had never felt before. It was terrifying and exhilarating all at once. I was wading into uncharted territory, allowing myself to feel something more than just physical attraction.
As our lips moved together, I allowed my mind to wander, to consider what it would be like to be with Jude. Not just physically, but emotionally, spiritually. Would we continue to laugh together? Would we argue? Would she comfort me in my moments of weakness and stand by my side in times of strength?
The more I thought about it, the more I realized that I wanted to find out. I wanted to explore this new terrain, to see where this journey with Jude would lead me.
In the silence of the room, as our lips finally parted, I stared into her eyes. They were filled with a warmth that made my heart pound hard in my chest.
It was more than just a kiss. It was a promise, and a pledge, signaling the start of something terrifying and wonderful all at once. As I gazed at Jude, a single thought solidified in my mind. This woman, with her fire, spirit, and vulnerability, might just be the one for me.
“You going to stare at me all night?” she asked, a coy smile on those sensual lips. “Or are you going to kiss me?”
“Oh, I’m going to kiss you,” I replied. “But you can’t blame a man for staring at a face like that.”
