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“Jade…” Eden says, touching my arm.
“I want you,” I blurt out like a lovestruck Neanderthal.
How is that helpful?
She smiles. “You just had me.”
With a wince, I shake my head. “No, I mean…Iwantyou. We want you. Not like as my mentor or as my friend. Like I think I love…you.”
It feels like I just dropped a bomb on the floor between us. It’s suffocating us with pressure and expectation, and I wish for a moment I hadn’t said it.
But it’s true, isn’t it? I do love her. I can’t stop thinking about her. I want her happiness more than my own, and I need her in a way I’ve never needed anyone.
“Jade,” she says again. “Let’s get dressed, and we can go talk.”
My jaw hangs open as I stare at her. “You’re shutting me down?”
Her expression turns serious. “No. I’m not—”
“Then what do we need to talk about? You either want me or you don’t.”
“It’s not that simple,” she argues.
“Yes, it is.” I snatch my bra from the bedpost and pull it on with jerky, angry movements.
“Jade, will you just calm down?”
“No,” I snap, turning toward her. “You want to go talk so you can tell me that you don’t do relationships, and Clay and I are nothing but clients to you.”
“Don’t put words in my mouth,” she replies angrily.
“Then put words in your own mouth. Say something. Anything. Stop running from your feelings. Stop running from us.”
“I’m not running from anything.”
“Yes, you are. Do you have any idea how terrifying it is to fall in love with you because you are so emotionally untouchable? It’s like your heart is inside a cage, and for what? To protect Jack?”
“Jade,” she snaps at the mention of her son, but I don’t stop.
“Do you really think staying single and avoiding love your entire life is going to keep him safe?”
Her eyes are moist as she steps closer to me. I feel like a child having to look up to see her, but I’m already too hot and frustrated to stop myself.
“You don’t know anything about me and Jack,” she says. Her words are clipped, and her voice is low as if she’s afraid to lose it at any moment. “You don’t know what we’ve been through.”
“Because you won’t tell me,” I argue. Seeing her get emotional for the first time is melting everything inside me. I have no weapons against that.
She turns away, walking to the corner of the room and hanging her head as she discreetly wipes her tears. “It’s not that easy, Jade.”
“I’m sorry—” I say, stepping toward her when the sound of a knock on the window cuts me off. I almost forgot we were in a voyeur room at the club, which is not the place to be having an argument or a delicate conversation.
We get dressed as quickly as we can, but it’s Eden who reaches for the door first. I don’t expect there to be anyone waiting on the other side, and I certainly don’t expect it to be Clay.
Eden and I are standing frozen as he gazes back and forth between us.
Did he see all that?
Did hehearall of that?
