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He squeezes my thigh, and then pulls his hand away like he’s realized what he’s doing. “It feels so wrong being close to you and not touching you. I think about touching you all the time. I remember everything about the way you felt in my arms. The way you tasted. I remember everything.”
“So do I,” I whisper.
“I’d do anything to have it all back.”
“I believe you.”
Dax once told me he always sees things through, once he’s committed. And now I understand; he will sleep on this porch for as many nights as it takes until I talk to him again.Really talk.
I reach over and take his hand, threading my fingers through his. The contact sends a vibration running up my arm, and Dax’s breathing stalls as he stares at our entwined skin.
The marble in my throat shifts suddenly, dropping into my stomach.
And it’s like a dam has been blown apart.
“Don’t think this means it’s all good.” My voice cracks as I begin to tremble, until I’m shaking so much I struggle to speak. “D-don’t t-think that this means—”
Dax pulls me to him, and his lips find my forehead as I sink into him, fighting to breathe past the giant sob building in my chest.
“Don’t think…” My breath leaves me as I choke out a strangled sound. “Don’t—"
He shushes me with such tenderness that I screw my eyes shut, my chest burning. “I’ve got you, Sunbeam.”
I sob out loud.Sunbeam.
The first drop of hot, salty liquid rolls over my skin, the sensation so foreign to me that I forget to breathe as another joins it.
Then another.
And another.
“Dax.” I hiccup as I try to breathe.
He kisses my forehead. “I’ve got you. And I always will, Rose. Whenever you need me, I will be here. Even if you can’t stand to look at me. Even if you can’t ever forgive me. Know that I will be here for you without question. Anywhere. Any reason. Any time. Okay?”
I bury my face into his neck as hot tears rush from my eyes.
They keep coming. Harder and faster. Until I’m sniffing and shuddering with the force of them taking over my body.
More than three years’ worth of tears.
All flowing out over the beautiful bird tattoo I love so much.
Dax crushes his lips to my forehead again, then he cups my face in his hands and wipes the tears from my cheeks with his thumbs as he looks into my eyes.
Dark brown meets light blue.
“I know all these tears aren’t for me. But some are.” Lines appear at the corners of his eyes. “I don’t deserve them, Rose,” he whispers. “I’m not worth your tears.”
He brushes more away, but they fall faster, running over his hands until they’re wet too.
“You’ve got them though.”
His eyes pinch, glassy with his own unshed tears as he strokes my face.
“I love you.”
I suck in a breath, looking through my tears as I blink at him.
