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“See, you don’t need to be an uptight asshole all your life,” Mav mocks.
My lips purse to bite back a snide remark but then Alana cries out and his eyes shoot to her instead.
“This must be killing you,” I muse, also turning to watch the show.
JD’s hands are everywhere as they continue to dance, her back to his front.
Her head is resting against his shoulder as the rain continues to soak them.
His hands lift from her hips, sliding up her waist until he takes the weight of her tits, squeezing them until she moans again.
“She’s happy,” he says, his voice deep and raspy.
“Pretty sure he is too,” I quip.“Five years without touching her and now you’re sitting here and watching this. Man, you’ve got the self-control of a fucking rock.”
He laughs, but there’s no humor behind it.
“It’s just her,” he says as if it’s meant to make sense. “She’s—” He cuts himself off, unable to find the right word to finish that sentence.
When I look back, JD has spun Alana around as they’re locked in a heated and filthy kiss. He’s hooked her shirt up to palm her ass, giving us a great view in the process.
Mav grunts, and I catch him tugging at his pants out of the corner of my eye.
“Fuck knows why, but she fucking loves you, man. All of this. Everything she’s done. It’s because of you.”
“Fucking hell.” He groans. It’s almost as if those words cause him physical pain.
“I doubt there are many men out there who can say their woman has done something so fucking fierce for them.”
“She’s one of a kind.”
JD hooks her leg up around his waist, grinding into her and making her cry out again. Her voice echoes into the night as they continue as if no one is watching.
“That she is.”
I don’t think he’s going to say anymore, so I’m surprised when he speaks again, although his voice is so low, I have to strain to hear it over the loud music and torrential rain.
“And all I’ve done is let her down.”
I stare at him, really fucking stare. Forcing myself to see beyond the man who’s irritated me most of my life to the man who’s clearly hopelessly in love with a woman he doesn’t believe he’s worthy of.
If my soul wasn’t completely black and fucking ruined, I might even feel sorry for the poor fuck.
I sigh, unable to believe I’m having this kind of heart to heart with a man I can’t stand.
“Then you’re a fucking idiot because that is the very opposite of what she thinks.”
“She wants that,” he hisses, pointing at Alana and JD.
My breath catches when I find that she’s facing us again with her shirt hooked around JD’s wrists as he plays with her tits, blatantly teasing us—Mav—with what he can have if he man’s up and takes it.
“Jesus.” I grunt, barely able to resist also adjusting my pants as I watch them.
“And I haven’t given her that. I’ve run at every opportunity.” He drags his hand down his face, scrubbing at his rough jaw. “She begged, pleaded with me for it. But I just… fuck. I don’t—”
“You were trying to do the right thing. That’s… admirable, I guess.”
“Is it. Or am I just a fucking loser?”
