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That was the thing about Kai and me. No matter what happened, I knew he’d never let me fall.
“Tease” transitioned into “Deep Down.” Throughout the song, I danced around Kai, drawing out those grins he fought to contain. Each one was like a nugget of gold. I hoarded them all, knowing I was the only one to make him soften like this.
But, like every show, everything flipped when “Night’s Darkest Secret”began. It was the sole song in our set where Luca and Kai switched roles. Like a lot of our catalogue, it was one Kai had penned. Kai had a beautiful voice but was loath to provide more than backing vocals. I had no idea what it was about this song that made Kai want to sing it, but for some reason, he’d insisted. I’d been surprised, but Arlo and Luca hadn’t. It didn’t matter. We all had each other’s backs, no matter what.
When we’d first pitched the song, our management had flipped their lids. Only when Luca outright refused to sing did they relent and let Kai do it.
And given it was our single biggest hit, it was a good thing they had. In fact, it’d been so successful that they’d pushed Kai time and again to take lead vocals on another track.
But for some unknown reason, he’d refused.
Without a guitar, Kai liked to occupy his free hand by slinging it over my shoulders and pulling me close. He’d crowd me from behind, singing the lyrics into my ear like he was whispering a secret. Arlo had once asked if it was odd, knowing I was straight and yet letting another man feel me up.
Logically, I got it. But this wasKai.He wasn’t just a random guy.
He was the other half of me.
Tonight, Kai grabbed the front of my throat and used it to haul me against him. Like me, he was respectful. While there wasn’t an inch between our upper halves, we were careful to keep our hips well apart. It wasn’t like the audience could see it anyway.
His big hands felt so right, cupping my neck. One of his fingers rested against my pulse point, and everything in me relaxed. I let my head fall against his shoulder, my eyes drifting closed as I lost myself in his husky voice.
Don’t you know you’re my secret?
How much more obvious can I be?
Because while you’re thinking of her,
I can’t help wishing you were thinking of me
Time and again, I’d asked Kai who the song was about. There was a pain to it, a deep, desperateneed. It had made me almost angry when I first heard it. I wanted to track down whoever was making Kai feel this way and shake them until they saw sense.
This secret is mine to keep
I’ll only share it now
In the dead of night
Because if I show it in the light of day
I know there’s a chance you’ll push me away
So that’s what it’ll always be
Night’s darkest secret
Wishing you were with me
“It’s no one,” Kai would say, brushing me off. “Don’t worry about it.”
It was the only secret he wouldn’t share with me.
It hurt.
The song came to an end, and Kai quickly stepped away to grab his guitar from Luca. He didn’t look at me as he did so, taking up a spot on the furthest end of the stage.
It made sense. We didn’t want to focus all our attention on one section of the audience.
The next number was fast and hot. I stepped up to the edge of the stage, lifting a foot and resting it on a speaker. My gaze was caught by a fan at the front of the pit. Big, bouncy blonde curls framed her heart-shaped face. Her top was low-cut, her breasts spilling over the neckline. My cock stiffened behind my bass.
