AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I follow, coming to stand directly behind her. I place a hand on each of her hips and pull her back into me so she’s resting against my chest. She doesn’t pull away, but she does lay her head back on my chest to sink into me even further. The relief I feel at her submitting to me is overwhelming, and I realize just how much I needed it.
“You are keeping things from me.” She says in a low voice, but she doesn’t turn to face me. She continues looking out the window in front of us. Before I can answer she starts again. “I understand there are things you won’t tell me or anyone yet. I can accept that. But what are we doing, Andrew? Every time I glimpse past the walls you’ve built to protect yourself; you clam up. You won’t let me in, but it’s clear there’s more between us than just sex.”
She’s right. My feelings for her are so much more than just someone to have sex with. I crave her presence, her scent, her touch, her body. I want all of her, and I want her all the time.
“I haven’t told you before now because…”
I pause and pull her tighter against me. My arms wrap around her waist. She holds my hands, and I rest my face against her head with my nose in her hair, just breathing in her lilac scent. How do I tell her how I feel and then break her heart?
“Because we can’t be together.” Her voice cracks as she speaks the words.
I turn her to face me, and I see her eyes are filled with tears. They don’t have a chance to fall. I cradle her face, wishing things could be different… better… Not this fucked-up hell I’m living in.
She takes a steadying breath and bites her trembling lip as she looks me in the eyes. “I can accept not being together right now because of everything going on, but I have to know all of this isn’t for nothing. You have to talk to me. I want to know you feel for me what I feel for you.”
“Of course, I do, Charlie. How could I not? You’re amazing! You’re everything I didn’t know I’ve been missing in my life and everything I could ever need to be whole again,” I tell her softly.
Leaning down, I kiss her gently. She pushes forward so her lips meet mine, but only for a second. The fire that ignites between us every time we touch is all-consuming.
She steps back, breaking our embrace. We study each other for several moments. I’m unsure what I can say. It’s not what either of us want, but it’s the way it has to be for now. Once we get through the trial with Christopher, it’ll be easier. We can be together all the time, and we can tell everyone.
Although, I think Charlie and I may be the last to know about our own feelings for each other.
“So, when the trial is over,” she says simply, though it’s not simple at all.
I won’t commit to not seeing her or not being with her. The thought of her being with anyone else brings anger out in me that I’ve never felt before.
“I don’t want to go without seeing you. I want to be with you. It’s hard to explain.”
I must sound ridiculous right now. “I want to be with you, but we can’t because everything is so fucked-up that I can’t be with you.” What the fuck am I even saying? All this sounds worse than awful.
A smile spreads across her face. “Stop brooding, Shaw.” Her chuckle makes me smile. “I don’t want to be with anyone else. I just want to know that when this is over, when the trial is over, it’s me and you. That’s all.”
“Damn straight you won’t see anyone else.”
I close the distance she created between us and lift her in my arms. She wraps her legs around my waist and grabs my hair in the back. I kiss her hard, her taste driving me wild.
She pulls back and quirks a brow at me. “That goes for you, too, mister. No one else, right?”
I kiss her again, even harder this time. “I wouldn’t dare think of another woman. I know what you’re capable of.”
She throws her head back and laughs. “That’s right. I can take a man out with a sheet pan. You better not forget it, either.”
I chuckle and rest my forehead against hers. I can’t describe the relief I feel in this moment.
She lets her legs slip off my waist, and I lower her to the floor. My hands glide across her ass and land on the small of her back. She tugs me towards her for a hug, and I bring my head down to her lips.
“I have to get back to work.”
My first instinct is to pout internally. I don’t want her to go, but this is how it has to be for now.
Before I can protest, she’s out the door and heading toward her red mustang. Her sass is on full display with every swing of her hips. She glances back at me with a small smile on her face. She blows me a kiss before she dips to get into her car. As usual, the tires squeal out of the driveway.
I shake my head and laugh out loud. She’s a force to be reckoned with, and damn if I can’t get enough of her.
Luckily, the reporters have died down after the news broke of Morales. There are still a few in town, and I’m sure it may pick back up again, but for now, it’s manageable. For that, I’m thankful.
Chapter Nineteen
