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“Could you beat those same guys in a professional fight?”
“I guess we’ll never know.”
“You just need to be so in control of everything in your life you’d rather do it the hard way?”
“If you don’t think going pro is the hard way, then you have no idea.”
“Is this about hockey?” she asked me, gently. “Because you lost your place, after the accident?”
I didn’t answer that.
I wasn’t really prepared for this inquisition. I was much more used to women who came out to the fights hopping right into my lap afterwards, congratulating me on my win. Or kissing my wounds better if I lost.
Wasn’t really loving all this opposition.
“I just finished a fight. I don’t need another one.”
“We’re not fighting,” she said softly. She hadn’t raised her voice or hardened her tone the whole time. But I could tell she was still upset. “There’s no shame in being injured, Shane. It wasn’t your fault. The fact that you can be an athlete again in any capacity after going through that, that’s a miracle.”
“No, it’s a miracle that I didn’t die in that crash. But this? Beating that guy tonight? This is no miracle. This is hard work.” Yeah, I was being a prick. Borderline condescending.
Maybe Iwaslooking for a fight.
But if I was trying to turn this into a fight, clearly, she wasn’t having it.
She just watched me, her eyes soft. “Can’t you work on something a little less dangerous?”
“Maybe you’re asking me to be something I’m not.”
“I’m asking you to be someone who values you as much as I do.”
What? The fuck. “You think I don’t value myself? Because I fight?”
“No, I question how much you value yourself because you put yourself in that position. In that kind of place, with that kind of people. It felt like… an illegal dog fight in there or something. It was gross. Those people betting on you… They probably would’ve been thrilled if you guys fought to the death.”
“Maybe I’ll save that for my final fight.”
“This is not funny. Not at all.”
“It was just a fight, Jolie. Between two willing participants. And now it’s over.”And you’re gone, to fucking California, in a week.
What do you even care?
I almost said it, but bit it back. I couldn’t even say that poisonous fucking word right now.
California.
“I’m not that naïve, Shane,” she said calmly. “I know what was going on in that room. And maybe I was naïve to it before, but now that I’ve been there, seen it myself… That was all illegal, right?”
“It doesn’t matter. I’m fine.”
“How can you say that? There’s no safety there. The referee wasn’t a professional. Even I could see that. And I’ve seen bits of UFC fights. They have medical people there and stuff. You had nothing.”
“I get a medical check before every fight. I take my health seriously. And my team collects blood tests from every opponent. I don’t fight guys who can’t provide a clean test. I don’t take unnecessary risks.”
“What about the risk of getting hurt? Or getting arrested?”
“It’s not a big deal. I’ve been arrested at a fight. The charges were dropped.”
