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“He’ll be here for a bit if he can get away for another break, maybe in an hour or so.”
“Eeep! Do you think he knows Jaden Skeritt is him? I haven’t had the nerve to ask him.”
“Dude, shut up. No one knows about that, and don’t you dare ask him about it.”
Her eyes slid to the side as she shook her head. “Ooookaaay, whatever you say. It’s not exactly a subtle hint. Just saying, Charlotte, he reads your books. I don’t know if he’s caught up though.”
“Oh god. He does? You know this how?”
“Girl, where are we? Come on! Do you think this is the first time we’ve discussed the illustrious Keli Marlowe’s work?”
I shook my head side to side, fighting the instinct to cover my ears and duck beneath the coffee table. “No one reads my books. I’m not here right now, I’m in Charlotte’s happy place. I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“This is going to be so much fun. You’re being ridiculous, Charli. You go to book signings and meet and greets all the time. What is up with you right now?”
“This is hard to explain, but I’ll try. Here in Sweetbriar, I am Charlotte Keli Cassidy and everyone knows me for real. At those other signings, I am Keli Badass Marlowe, and she is quite clearly not me. I either need to go home and hide, or drink like three more of these martinis in order to cope with this. I made a huge mistake when I said I’d come here. What was I thinking?”
“No way. You’ll be fine. And there is no way I’m letting you get drunk. Drunk Charlotte has zero filter and if you don’t want it coming out that Jaden Skeritt is Caden Barrett and you’re about to write dirty fan fiction of your own life in your next book, then you need to be sober so you can lie your ass off.”
“Crap. Shoot. Frick. Why, Gwen? Why am I the way that I am?”
“What I’m about to say goes along with why you’re freaking out right now—which makes total sense, by the way. Listen, you choose to live your life not thinking deeply about the things that bother you.” She shrugged. “Most of the time it works for you. You write books to get your feelings out, and if someone makes you mad you kill them off. You disconnect, you put things in boxes, you compartmentalize. At some point you’ve got to put it all together and feel your feelings, Charlotte. It might help in situations like this.”
“Ouch, Gwen. Quit being real and just pat me on the head, please. Tell me it’s going to be okay.”
“No, because I want you to stick around this time. You need to sort yourself out and I’m here to help. I miss you. I love you. I need my best friend back in town. And you need me too. You’ll never be able to stay in Sweetbriar unless you resolve your feelings about Cade.”
“Maybe you’re right. But not right now, okay? I’ll think about resolving stuff later. Right now I want my denial back.” I brushed a tear away before it could fall and ruin my perfect makeup.
Freaking feelings.
“I’m here for you too.” Violet sat across from me in a club chair and patted my knee. “Don’t make her think too hard tonight, Gwen. We have time, don’t we, Charlotte. Your heart is here in Sweetbriar. You brought it back with you this time.”
I smiled at Vi. “Yeah, I did.”
She stood and patted my head. “It’s going to be okay. I love you, Charli. You’re a Barrett for life.” With a wink, she headed off to the front of the shop to greet the book club members as they arrived.
“Love you too,” I called.
Barrett for life.
Mrs. Charlotte Keli Cassidy-Barrett. Could I really be her again?
“People are starting to arrive. Are you ready for this?”
“Heck no!” I checked the time on my cell phone then put it on the coffee table. “It’s too late to cancel. I have to be okay, Gwen. Like a dumbass, I kept inviting people to come here. I can’t leave.”
“It’s going to be fine. For real. This is your home, and you’re a great writer. Everyone loves you. Do you want me to pat you on the head now?” she teased gently.
“No, you did great. I feel a bit better.” I took another swig of my martini and tried to gird my loins.
“Good. Oh hey! Your brothers are here, and your dad. Brody! Over here.” She waved my brother over while the rest of them took seats at a table and smiled at me.
“Oh man. No one better ask me about the love scenes in front of my dad and brothers. I swear—”
“Oh, please.” She laughed. “Get ready, because it will probably be the second question. And only because no one will have the balls to lead with it.”
“Ugh.I need another drink. Just one more.”
