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Here she paused and looked down at her hands on the table which were balling up her napkin. Continuing to look down, she stated in a nervous voice “I found out I’m pregnant.”
The shock and concern on Jessica’s face was evident. Elizabeth rambled on, scared to pause, afraid she might not finish.
“I’m due around Thanksgiving. I have already gone to the pregnancy center. At first, I wanted an abortion, and called there to ask about one. I ended up talking with Mrs. Green. She and my mom both made me realize I’m not alone and have support. I was having a hard time deciding what to do and was really considering an abortion. Then I realized I couldn’t go through with it. Today, I went to the doctor which is why I got to work late. He says everything is great. I’m still doubting everything and am scared to death, but well, that’s it.” She stopped at this point and breathed. She didn’t realize she had been holding her breath until she finished and let it out, then she finally looked up across the table.
Jessica was frozen for a minute taking it all in, then jumped up and ran around the table to sit next to Elizabeth. She wrapped her in a big hug, laughing and crying at the same time. Elizabeth couldn’t help herself and found herself laughing and crying too.
“Wow! That’s amazing. I guess. I mean, not that you wanted an abortion, or are confused and scared, but about the baby.”
Jessica pulled away and looked at her friend at arm’s length. “What happened with Jacob? Did you tell him?”
Concern filled Jessica’s eyes at the thought of Jacob getting upset about this. Elizabeth told her everything that happened, Kristen told him just part of the story, him filling in the blanks, and then Elizabeth telling him the truth.
“I told him I couldn’t deal with a relationship right now and apologized for leading him on when I knew I shouldn’t have. That was Saturday. I haven’t seen or talked to him since.” Jessica embraced Elizabeth again when she saw tears forming in her eyes.
“I’m so sorry!” Jessica reassured her.
Elizabeth took a breath, wiped away the tears, and started to laugh out of frustration. “I am so tired of crying all the time!”
“It’s the hormones. They say they are all over the place when you’re pregnant. But seriously, are you going to be okay? You’re dealing with a lot.”
Elizabeth, feeling better, looked at Jessica, smiled, and gave her a thumbs up. “I will be. I know I’m not alone. There are lots of people on my side to help me figure this nightmare out.”
“Nightmare? I know I’m not in your situation, but isn’t calling being pregnant a ‘nightmare’ a bit harsh?” Jessica looked at her friend.
“No, that’s not what I mean. What I mean is that I know I have more support than a lot of people, and I’m extremely thankful for that; I’ve realized it might not be as bad as I thought, and at first, like I said, I wasn’t excited, and I was very scared and embarrassed. I still am and haven’t gotten excited about being pregnant yet, but I’m good with things. It’s pretty amazing really. But wow. Scary!”
Elizabeth smiled and laughed at the realization. “I’m gonna be a mom. That sounds so strange.”
Jessica, laughing too, again hugged her friend, then looked at Elizabeth. “Yeah, you are. And don’t be embarrassed. Be proud of your decision. I’m sure it’s gonna be hard, but I’ll be here to help you and be a friend when you need it.”
Elizabeth smiled with joy. “Thank you so much. I’m gonna be needing you a lot.”
“Good. I like to be needed.”
The next couple of weeks passed quickly and before Elizabeth knew it, it was the end of the summer. Since it was her day off, and a beautiful sunny day at that, Elizabeth chose to spend it out in her mother’s garden. Weeding the flowers and vegetables always helped her to relax. She needed to think through the phone conversation she had last night.
Her friend, and college roommate, Trina, called her. It was the first time the two girls talked all summer. It was at that time Elizabeth realized how much her life had changed since she walked into her house back in June. Just a few months ago, she and Trina shared everything, literally. Not just gossip and laughs, but joints, homework, beer, and even guys.
Here they were on the phone talking about their summers and their next steps. Trina was preparing to move down to Florida, to find a marketing job just like they always talked about in their dorm room late at night. She wanted to know if Elizabeth was still interested in going. The beach, a job, and each other was a dream of theirs. They took the motto “YOLO” to the next level and always said, ‘You only live once, so you might as well live how you wanted, while you can’.
Instead of Elizabeth eagerly agreeing with her friend and packing to go with Trina to look for a place in Florida, she found herself telling Trina about her summer and being pregnant. Trina was shocked, and when she found out how far along Elizabeth was, she wanted to know who the father was and immediately thought of Brady.
Thoughtfully, Elizabeth answered her friend. Because of her due date, and how far along she is, she was positive Brady was the father.
Trina then asked her a question, which Elizabeth never considered until that moment. Was she going to let him know? That was something she had to really think about.
They finally got off the phone with Elizabeth telling Trina to enjoy herself and be careful and she promised she would let her know when the baby arrived. Now pulling weeds and cleaning up the vegetable bed, Elizabeth found herself missing the life she led at college and the life she and Trina planned. The beach would have been amazing to live by. Working all day, being able to walk in the waves at night. If she had some extra time after work, she could run on the beach with the waves at her feet. On the weekends they could have had one long beach party.
“Could ‘a, should ‘a, would ‘a. Can’t live life that way.” Elizabeth got up from her kneeling position, brushed the dirt from her hands and knees and felt the baby beach ball she had growing. She laughed at the irony. “Well, I may not have a beach ball to play with, with sand under my toes, but I have a beach ball to rub and to watch grow into something more amazing.”
She looked down at her stomach which pushed her dress out more and more every day. Sometimes she felt little movements in there like the little one was doing flips. Surprisingly, Elizabeth found herself smiling at her new reality.
Her summer had been different than what she originally thought it would be. A new group of friends, her church, her work, and the meetings at the pregnancy center kept her occupied and busy. The unexpected, and relatively short-lived relationship with Jacob was a sore spot in her summer, which she tried her best to avoid thinking about. Between work, church, her group meetings at the pregnancy center, and spending time with Jessica and her parents, Elizabeth didn’t have much extra time left to avoid Jacob, which was basically why she kept busy in the first place.
Elizabeth was picking up groceries after work. She was having Jessica over, and the girls planned to make a nice dinner for Elizabeth’s parents. She was so focused on her list, and the music she was listening to on her phone that she wasn’t really focusing on her surroundings. She turned the corner to head down the next aisle and ran directly into a person who fell in her cart and grabbed at the sides.
“Whoa! Slow it down!”
