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He stilled, and I moved closer. Reaching out, I dusted my fingers over his back, making him wince. “Does it hurt?” I asked as I touched the large white scar that ran from his shoulder blade down to the middle of his back.
“No, it’s old.”
“How old?”
“Two years.”
“Go sit,” I whispered as I tried to calm my beating heart.
Grabbing the whiskey bottle and glasses, I moved to the bed, climbing in next to him. “How drunk do you need to be to talk about it?”
“Very.”
I poured him a large glass full and then my own.
“You really can trust me, Archer. I want you to know that.”
He leaned back against the headboard. “Can I though? I don’t mean to be rude, but most people just want to sell us out. What’s to stop you doing the same?”
“Archer, you said so yourself… I make octopus porn. Do you think I want or need to draw more attention to myself? I’m not trying to sell your secrets. Do you want me to tell you one of mine so you know I won’t spill yours?”
He shook his head. “You don’t have to.”
I took a deep breath. “My mum abandoned me. When I was eight, she walked out on me and my dad. She said she was going shopping, and we never saw her again. We moved from up north soon after and we… neither of us… have ever told anyone other than Lea. If you ask my dad, he will tell you she’s dead. I don’t talk about her. Until today.”
He paused, dusting his fingers from my shoulder down my arm, his touch making my skin tingle. “Thank you,” he whispered.
“Now you. What happened to your back?”
Archer held up his glass, offering me a cheers before he downed the lot, coughing and spluttering, his eyes watering. “I had a bad experience. I asked someone to dominate me. I put my trust in the wrong person and that scar was the result.”
“A man?”
“A woman. She beat me because she thought I wanted it.”
I gasped. “You didn’t?”
“I did… I mean, I thought I did.” He ran his fingers through his hair. “I wasn’t sure. She tied me up, started gentle, but then decided I was weak and needed more pain… more punishment. She only stopped when my friends heard me screaming and dragged her off.”
“Fuck, Arch, that’s awful. You didn’t use your safe word?”
“She told me real men didn’t need one.”
I couldn’t help it. I needed to touch him… to comfort him… to take away his pain. Straddling his thighs, I pulled him into me, carding my fingers through his hair as he wrapped his arms around my waist. “No one, ever, should make you feel like you aren’t in control. There is never a point where you can’t say no and stop. That’s what consent is all about, right?”
He nodded against my chest.
“And since then… have you tried it again?”
“No.”
“You’ve not let anyone tie you up?”
I felt his breathing change as he squeezed me tighter. “I’ve not had sex… I’ve not been able to come. To be honest, until I came to your gallery, I’d not even been able to get hard.”
I let his words settle in the air around us, feeling the physical shift in his body from releasing his secrets. Leaning back slightly so he could look up at me, I spoke, “And what changed at my show?”
He paused, his eyes searching mine as if he was thinking about how best to answer. “You.”
