Page 50 of Kind of a Sexy Jerk


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“I’ll come with you,” Bear says in a steadier voice. “I’m not getting any bad vibes from the two of you, and I’m dying to see her.” He nods my way. “And you don’t sound like the guy who’s been calling me. He clearly smokes a pack a day.”

“Rex!” Nora says, casting a guilty look my way as I move past her to open the door. “Sorry. I don’t know if I was supposed to say that or not, but it has to be Rex, right? He sounds like he gargled battery acid.”

“Probably.” I catch Bear’s gaze as he follows me inside with Nora close behind. “I’d love it if you’d fill me in on all that. The phone calls, etc. After we take care of Clyde, obviously.”

Hearing her name, Clyde meows pitifully from the other room. Instantly, Bear grabs the box and other supplies and goes running. “I’m coming, kiddo! Hold on. Daddy’s here.”

Nora turns to me, hissing beneath her breath, “Sorry, I heard him talking to the front desk downstairs about putting a tracking device in his cat’s collar, realized who he was, and had to bring him up.” Her lips turn down hard. “He was so sad. It was heartbreaking.”

I squeeze her arm. “You did the right thing. I’m sorry I pushed you into going downstairs like that. It was stupid, immature, and I—”

She covers my lips with her hand. “Stop. It was sexy and awesome. And I’m going to need a rain check on that sexy and awesome as soon as possible.” She pulls her fingers away, casting a nervous glance toward the other room before turning back to me. “Do you think he really trusts us? He seems so kind, I don’t want him to think we’re the bad guys.”

“We’ll win him over,” I assure her, hoping I’m right. “But I should call my handler, let him know there’s been an unexpected development.”

Nora nods. “Okay. I’ll sneak into the bathroom and change, then offer Bear moral support. And tea. Or coffee. Or room service and a neck massage. I feel so terrible.”

“Don’t,” I insist. “You’re part of the solution here, not the problem.” I hesitate before adding, “But maybe go ahead and gather your things for a quick getaway? Just in case he decides to call the police? I’d rather not have to explain everything to local law enforcement. I’ve already broken cover with way too many people already.” I sigh. “My handler isn’t going to be happy.”

“Then don’t tell him,” she says with a shrug. “I’m not going to tell anyone. Neither is Melissa or Aaron. My brother is a vault. I swear. And I made sure he didn’t tell Gram this morning so you should be good. Gram’s the only one who might start telling tales out of class. Or at the senior center. They’re awful down there. I think maybe they’re just so old they’ve forgotten how mortifying gossip can be when you’ve got more than twenty years left to live with the fallout.”

I smile. “It’s a solid theory.” Pulling out my cell, I assure her, “I’ll be right in. Scream if you need help.”

She shakes her head. “I’m not worried. Like Bear said, I’m getting no bad vibes around here.” Clyde lets out a long, low moan that sends Nora moving toward the bedroom. “But definite pain vibes, poor little girl. I’ll see if I can help get her comfortable.”

While Nora hurries in to assist with cat wrangling, I call Al’s emergency line for the second time in two days. I’ve only called it four times in my entire career, a fact that underlines what an absolute shit show I have on my hands.

Al answers with a grunt and a cantankerous, “Yes?”

I give my code word and badge number, but Al’s next grunt isn’t any friendlier than his last. “What now?” he asks, with a sigh.

“There’s been a development. Bear Hanson just showed up at my hotel room.” I briefly fill him in on the tracking device in the cat’s collar and the fact that one of the kidnappers, most likely Rex, has been in touch with Bear. “I’m going to get more information on that as soon as possible.”

“How about now?” Al snaps. “Now is a good time, Matthew. Yesterday would have been even better. We need to wrap this up before things get any sloppier than they are already.”

“I know, I know,” I assure him, bracing myself as I add, “but the cat’s giving birth right now.”

“What?”

“The cat, Clyde, she’s giving birth. She was pregnant. Bear’s in the bedroom with her now, but agreed to speak with me after. I had to tell him that I was with the agency to gain his trust, so he might be calling the helpline later if he feels the need. I also had to tell Nora. I wanted her to know that she was safe and not actually on the run with a criminal.”

“And the maid?” Al asks in a flat tone.

I frown. “The maid?”

“The maid,” Al repeats. “Did you tell her, too? What about the civilians hanging out in the lobby? Maybe you should go make an announcement at the conference you’re supposed to be attending today instead of fucking this case more than it’s been fucked already.”

“Nora isn’t going to blow my cover,” I assure him, my stomach roiling as I hope the same can be said of her brother. Mel is my ultimate ride or die, obviously, but Aaron is a bit more of an unknown quantity. But does it really matter at this point? “I’m almost out anyway,” I remind Al. “As soon as this is wrapped, so am I.”

“But you signed up to be an invisible asset, not an officer who works nine to five at the local field office,” Al shoots back. “If you’d wanted that life, you could have had it. But you wanted the excitement and adventure of the more covert arm of the agency. And with that adventure comes certain sacrifices. Sacrifices you agreed to make for the duration of your employment and retirement, not until it feels inconvenient for you to do so.”

My shoulders tighten as I dip my chin to my chest. “I know. I’m sorry. It’s just been one thing after another with this case. But Hanson showing up here could be the break I’ve needed. I can reunite him with his cat and hook him up with the FBI. Since the kidnapping has crossed state lines, it’s going to be in their jurisdiction.”

“Except that it’s a cat, not a kid,” Al says with a put upon sigh. “But I’ve been in touch with a few of my contacts. They’re ready to step in and offer assistance when we’re ready for a hand off.”

A bit of the tension eases from my muscles. “Great. Thank you. While the FBI is busy rounding up the lesser Sweetwaters on kidnapping and extortion charges, I can focus on getting the digital trail we need on Cassie Ann. Once we prove she’s supporting terrorist threats in Canada, we can close the book on the entire organization.” A rumble of thunder shakes the walls, giving me another idea. “The rain might even work in our favor with that. If it keeps coming down like this, I doubt the cupcake shop will be open tomorrow, and Wimpy and Rex are trapped on their compound on the other side of a flooded-out road. Hopefully, I’ll be able to get in, get the data I need, and get out without anyone noticing I’m there.”

“Don’t hope, make it happen,” Al says, but he sounds a tad less grumpy as he adds, “And stay safe on the roads if you head back into town tomorrow. The flooding in Bad Dog is already national news and it’s only supposed to get worse overnight.”

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