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Our laughter increases even more as we continue reminiscing.Now that I think about it, it was one of the last times we shared as friends.A few days later, he left for Harvard, and I enlisted in the military.
“Thankfully, your brother came and vouched for me.Never told my father or anyone else about it, either.”
I nod, my laughter waning.But not out of remorse or regret, as once was the case whenever my brother came up in conversation.Now that I know the truth, it’s helped me look at things through a different lens.
It’s helped me seemy brotherthrough a different lens.
We may have had our fair share of disagreements, but when it mattered, he was always there for me.
Like he was there for Anderson the morning he was almost pummeled to death by an old woman in a floral house coat.
“Speaking of my brother,” I begin, clearing my throat.“There’s something I’d like to talk to you about.Although I’m not sure if I’m doing so as your friend or your CPO.”
“Okay…” Anderson draws out, curious eyes focusing on me.“What is it?Is something wrong?”
“Actually, no.The opposite, really.”I lick my lips, briefly staring out over the horizon, nothing but blue ocean visible for miles.“Over the past few days, I’ve done a lot of thinking.”
“About what?”
“Well, my living arrangement for starters,” I answer, figuring I’d ease into the conversation with something I’m certain he’ll support unequivocally.“Living with Rory, and everything that goes along with that.”
“It’s about damn time.”He takes a sip of his sparkling water.“I’ve been telling you for years it’s unhealthy.I understand you made your brother a promise to always be there for them, but I doubt he meant for you to sacrifice living your own life in order to keep it.”He leans closer, dropping his voice.“And Ireallydoubt he meant for you to let Rory fuck you while calling you by your brother’s name.”
I cringe at his statement, but it’s true.
An arrangement born out of guilt and regret festered into something incredibly detrimental for far too long.Unfortunately, I enabled it.Didn’t put a stop to it, even though I knew it was wrong.
No more.
“I see that now, and I’m done with it.”
“So you’re moving out?That’s your big news?”
“No.I mean, yes.Iammoving out, although I still need to tell her, but that’s not what I want to talk to you about.”
“Then—”
“I’m retiring from the guard.”
Anderson doesn’t immediately respond.Just stares at me in stunned silence, the only sound that of the white canvas sail inflating and deflating in time with the waves lapping against the hull, a few seagulls squawking in the distance.
“It’s probably not what you want to hear, especially with the upcoming referendum vote, but I’m eligible in August so—”
“It’s about bloody time, you dolt!”he exclaims, flinging his arms around me, squeezing tightly.
“You’re not upset?”
“Upset?”He meets my eyes.“Why the bloody hell would I be upset about that?”
“Because now you’ll have to get used to a new CPO.”
“Who cares about that?”He waves me off, grabbing a grape off the platter of fruit and cheese.He pops one into his mouth.“You’re damn good at your job.Which means all the guys on your team are damn good at their jobs.I have no doubt whoever you decide should replace you will be more than capable of stepping into your shoes.”
“Any member of the team will do everything in their power to keep you safe from any and all threats.”
“Exactly.I’m happy for you, Creed.”He squeezes my shoulder and smiles, not a single hint of disappointment in his expression.Then he drops his hold on me.“Have you told your father?”
“Not yet.I just made this decision yesterday, more or less.I’d been thinking about it for a while, but I don’t know…” I exhale, relaxing further into the seat cushion.“It’s time I start living for myself.Making my own choices.Charting my own course.To hell with the expectations my father’s placed on my shoulders all my life.”
