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Esme
I hurriedly swipeat my cheeks as I study my reflection in the bathroom mirror, drawing in several deep breaths in the hopes of regaining my composure.
If I were anyone else, I’d be able to leave and put the pieces of my broken heart back together in private, preferably with a bottle of wine and a tub of ice cream.But since I learned the truth at a diplomatic event, I have no choice but to stay, pretend everything’s fine when it feels like my life’s falling apart more and more every day.
I don’t know why I hoped Creed would run after me.Swear his love for me.Realize he fucked up and vow never to choose the crown over me again.
But he didn’t.
Solidifying my belief that he’ll never choose me.Not when it matters.Maybe that’s why he’s been distant.Not because of the truth he’s been keeping from me.But because as his retirement drew near, he’s been questioning whether he can actually go through with it.
If he can walk away from his legacy for me.
I thought this was finally our chance to be together.
Apparently, I’m not enough for him.
I’ll neverbeenough.
I push down more tears threatening to fall, rebuilding the wall around my heart, brick by painful brick.Then I fix my mouth into the practiced smile I’ve perfected over the years.
The one that manages to hide everything under its false veneer.
After one last check of my appearance to make sure I’ve successfully hidden all evidence of a broken heart, I open the door, heading toward the formal ballroom.But before I can rejoin the party, a motion out of the corner of my eye catches my attention.I snap my head to my right, inhaling a sharp breath when I see Creed rushing toward me.His long strides are swift and determined, his piercing gaze radiating an intensity that makes my heart both soar and break at the same time.
He grabs my hand, pulling me away from the open doors of the ballroom and into a darkened corridor.Laughter and jovial conversation from the party still find its way to us, the happy atmosphere at complete odds with the heartache plaguing me.
And, by the look of things, plaguing Creed, too.
“Please, Esme,” he whispers, his dark eyes reflecting an emotion that matches my own.“You have to believe me when I tell you that taking away your decision-making ability never entered into the equation.I just want to keep you safe.That’s all.I love you.Today.Tomorrow.Always.”
This is what I wanted — for Creed to run after me and tell me he loves me.
But they’re just words.Now more than ever, I need action.
Placing my hands on my hips, I hold my head high.“Prove it.”
“Prove it?”He furrows his brow.“I’ve told you time and again how I feel about you.You know how much I care about you.How much—”
“Right here.Right now.”I turn from him and march into the foyer, positioning myself in front of the open doorway of the ballroom, where I’m in full view of all the guests.
Where Creed would be in full view, too.
“Kiss me,” I beg softly, eyes glossing over.
He stares at me for several long moments.“Esme…”
“Please, Creed,” I choke out, swallowing down a new wave of tears.
I know I’m asking the impossible of him.Know he’s still a member of the royal guard and if he does this, it won’t end well for him.Even if he only has a few weeks left until he’s set to retire, he’ll no longer be able to retire with honor.
But I need to know he wants me.Need to know he’ll put me first.Need to know the crown won’t always come between us.
To my surprise, he steps slowly toward me, stopping several inches away.His eyes dart toward the ballroom, scanning the hundred or so guests mingling around the large space, including several important members of the royal household.When he looks back at me, he traces his gaze over my lips, making me think he’s about to kiss me.
Then his shoulders fall and he shakes his head.“I… I can’t.”
My knees buckle, a vice squeezing my heart as I suck in a shuttering breath.But I force myself to stand tall, show no emotion.I can’t.Not when I’m on full display like this.
