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I want to scream.
I want to cry.
I want to throw up.
But more than anything, I want Decker.
As we travel through the streets, I close my eyes and remember that precious, stolen moment when he asked for my forgiveness. Which, of course, I gave him.
Did he know, though?
Before these men came barging in, did he see that I would forgive him for anything? That my feelings for him were more than just lust.
And that I was wondering if he was feeling the same.
Now, I don’t even know if he’s still alive. The thought makes me gasp for air. I asked the men, but they just laughed at me. If he is, I know Decker will hate himself for trying to help all those women while putting me in danger.
My life for all those hundreds of people. I’m not going to pretend I’m okay with it. I’m not. I’m terrified. But I know why he did it.
That’s who he is.
And I respect him for it.
Most people care for a few minutes while watching a video on social media, but he’s given up his life to work undercover and use his skills to help these defenseless individuals.
That takes a special kind of person and commitment.
While I put on my dental assistant uniform each day, Decker is living in danger with people he despises and who do the most despicable things.
Is it wrong that my guilt for being intimate with Decker has vanished? Well, I have.
The truth is, most days I forget Todd is my fiancé. I see him for our weekly date, which feels more like an obligation than anything else. We tell our families we speak daily and see each other far more. I don’t think they care as long as we marry.
I don’t know what marriage would have been like with Todd—let’s face it, I’m not going home now—but I never wanted him to touch me, let alone had ever felt the same electrifying desire I feel for Decker.
I have never even thought about waking up to see Todd’s eyes watching me. Or imagined his cock in my mouth.
I close my eyes and wish I could magically transport into Decker’s arms.
But I’m on my own.
I slowly open my eyes, knowing I have one ace card to play. Technically, two. Decker told me these men are driven by money. Well, I come from an affluent familyandknow one of the wealthiest men in the United States.
He just happens to be married to my very alive—thank god—best friend.
“If you give me a phone, I can make you all very rich men. All you need to do is take me to an airport and let me go home.”
Four of the five faces turn to look at me.
Then they burst out laughing.
