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BLADE
“How long have we been out here?” Hawk asks anxiously, checking his watch.
Without saying it, I know he’s thinking about being away from Tessa. One look at Rider confirms that he’s thinking the same thing about Sutton.
I would’ve given Hawk and Rider shit a week ago for being distracted by their women, but now I get it. Leaving Sonya in her room, still panting from her first orgasm, was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done.
“Shit,” I mutter, the realization of that last thought echoing in my brain.
I left her after I gave her an intense first sexual experience.
I told her I’d find her when I got back, but I thought this run would take two or three hours tops. Instead, we’ve patrolled the abandoned warehouses where we store our product and staked out the police station and Sheriff Darren’s house for fourteen fucking hours.
“That’s not exactly an answer,” Hawk replies.
I glare at him, and he backs down.
What started as a typical run of exchanging goods for cold hard cash turned into a stakeout when we realized we were being set up. Gotta hand it to the sheriff and his goons; this was one of their better ploys to take us down. They must have gotten some good intel with our client list, which means we’ll need to revisit everyone we sell guns to.
But that will have to wait.
“Too damn long,” I tell him, answering his earlier question. “We shouldn’t be staking out shit. We should’ve vetted our client list better or picked up on red flags for the sale. Any amount of time spent out here is too long.”
“Prez, it wasn’t your fault we were set up,” Rider says.
“Didn’t say it was. Just stating facts.”
Hawk and Rider nod while the other men around me grumble about being tired.
I close my eyes and wipe a hand down my face, releasing a sigh. I walk from one end of our lookout spot to the other, then wave the men away. “Go home. Get some sleep. It’s nearly five in the morning. I’ll call church when we have something more to go off.”
Sighs of relief and grunts of acknowledgment fill the air, and in three minutes flat, almost everyone has cleared out. Surprisingly, Hawk and Rider remain, along with Axel. I catch the last part of a question as I approach the group.
“...Saturday night?” Hawk asks Rider.
“I’ll check with Sutton. I know she’ll love the idea of a grill out.”
All three men look at me expectantly, as if I have a special mission for them. Not this time. I just don’t know how to ask what I want to ask.
“Prez? Everything okay?” Hawk asks.
“Yeah,” I say, coughing the word out. Jesus, when did I become so awkward? “Well, no. But it’s not club business. It’s… Sonya.” I wait for the two of them to give me shit, but surprisingly, they simply nod and listen. “I think I screwed up already. I don’t know how to… shit, I don’t know how to do any of this. Be in a relationship. Trust someone. I don’t know how to take care of someone like Sonya. I’m afraid I’m not good enough.”
I clear my throat and train my gaze on the ground, rubbing the back of my neck anxiously. I didn’t mean for all that to come out, but it’s true. Every word. I know Hawk is going to have a great time poking fun at me for finally falling for a woman, but I’m not in the mood to hear it.
I’m shocked yet again when he gives me a serious answer.
“The fact that you’re worried about not being good enough means you’re on the right track,” Hawk says.
“Does she feel safe around you?” Rider asks.
I think back to yesterday when I held her in my arms as she wept. “Yeah, she knows I’ll protect her no matter what.”
“How does she make you feel?” Axel pipes in.
“And what do you know about relationships?” I grunt.
He shrugs and gives me an easy smile. “About as much as you do.”
