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I was about to give my time to company work when I recalled the stranger at the bar. I pulled up my social media pages and searched, using different criteria but not really knowing what I was looking for. Without a name, it would be nearly impossible to find out anything about him. I stopped searching and leaned back in my seat.
For a moment, I closed my eyes and tried to remember him. His face was vivid in my imagination, and I smiled at the intensity of the emotion I remembered in his eyes. At the back of my mind, I saw a vague image of someone who might be him. It was a memory I had suppressed during a wild night out. I had drunken sex with someone at a club, losing my virginity. It wasn’t traumatic. I just couldn’t remember anything about it-or the man.
However, the pregnancy that came out of the encounter was real. I was so stupid five years ago. It was a dark period in my life. I was so overwhelmed with embarrassment that I hid the pregnancy from my overprotective brothers and friends.
When I was in labor, the thought of calling up my brothers or their wives was tempting. What could I have said,I am sorry I didn’t share the news with you. In the end, I was alone and almost went mad from the pain.
Sadly, when the child was born, the joy many spoke of when they gave birth didn’t happen for me. I felt hollow and spent. I had to have the nurses help me feed him. I felt like a shell of my former self. Annoyed and frustrated, I decided that I couldn’t keep him.
I left the child at the club Ithaca. The same club that my brain associated with the root of my issue. It was at club Ithaca that I lost my virginity and became pregnant. I didn’t hate the child; I was just ashamed of myself–young and dumb and not ready to be a mother.
He wouldn’t stop crying and every time I looked at him, the urge to shake him until he stopped was overwhelming. I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t eat. I just existed. I sought the help of a psychologist. I later learned that I had suffered from post-partum depression.
Even after that, I could not completely absolve myself.
I wish I had been wiser; maybe I should have given him to a childless couple or a nanny to raise him—then I’d be able to see him again. I could slap myself, my brothers would have done everything in their power to find the father and take care of my son. However, at the time, I was too ashamed. He should be four years old by now. I wondered where he was and if his life was good. My heart ached with pain and the guilt was overwhelming.
I absently wiped my cheeks. My hand came back wet—I was crying. I had to do something, right the wrong. I forgot about the stranger and reached for my mobile to call a private investigator I know.
“Chris, thanks for answering. I have a very important case. I would appreciate it if you could drop everything and focus on it. Please, this is very important. I should have done this a while ago.” I struggled to keep the desperation from my voice.
“Okay. What’s the case about? Let’s hear it.” I let myself feel relieved for a moment. The next moment, I told him all I could remember about the incident five years ago. He promised to work on it and get back to me. I just had to wait, something I hated doing. Remembering the situation of my brother Lorenzo, and his wife, Crystal, I wondered if having a child out in the world was a trait or a family curse.
A call came in, and I answered without looking, “Marie! missed me? Girl, believe it or not, I will be coming home soon and would love to hang out.”
“Shut up, Lena! My God, that’s great news. We must meet; there’s so much I have to tell you.” I exclaimed with emotion. If there was anyone I needed right now, it was her.
Selena was my best friend. We met about four years ago when she helped me through a difficult period. I think of Lena as my sister. It feels like we have known each other all our lives. I miss her something fierce. She always knew what to do, how to solve a problem, or just the right words to say.
“That’s the spirit. Keep the tea hot, and I promise I will bring you some of the goodies from my travels. They’re to die for.” I shared in her enthusiasm. She always brought back great gifts whenever she was out of the country.
“Truly, Lena, I have missed you. Welcome home in advance.” I sighed into the phone.
Chapter 4
KARL
Thiswasastrangescenario. I found it hard to believe she of all people would appear in front of me, claiming Jason as hers. She tried to look bold under my gaze, but I saw how her hands shook.
“Come on, don’t be stuck up. It’s me, remember?” She spoke indignantly, spinning slowly for me to see the dress she wore. I looked away wondering why no one told me of her arrival. I turned around at the sound of someone approaching.
“Good morning, Sir. Miss Laura came late last night, and I tried reaching you; unfortunately, I couldn’t reach you on your cell phone. Since she is a family friend, I let her in. However, she was determined to wait.”
She looked apologetic. Sighing, I rubbed my temple. It was true. Laura was a regular visitor when she and I were dating. We were on again, off again over the years. I never gave the order not to let her in after our breakup. I discovered later that she put an aphrodisiac in my drink, forcing me have sex with her without a condom. Still thinking about it now made me clench my jaw until it hurt - I was always careful to use a condom. I sighed, remembering that last night I had failed to do that. If she was right about Jason, then she must have succeeded. Why then did she drop him off at club Ithaca.
“Laura, you should go back to where you came from. If your claim is true, I’ll consider a favorable arrangement.” I had no intention of being in a relationship with her again, even if she was truly Jason’s mother. What happened between us five years ago meant nothing to me. I never felt any connection to any of the women I’ve bed, except one.
I was on another of my regular benders when she walked into the club. I felt her more than saw her and when our eyes connected across the crowded dance floor, well what happened next was inevitable. Tall, petite, cute as a button. I was a goner. It was, in six words,the best night of my life.
I turned away from Laura, about to make my way upstairs. I expected her to leave after I had turned her down.
“You can’t do that. I came all this way to see you and my child, and you’re just going to throw me out. Look, you don’t have to be cold to me. I have good intentions; that's why I’m here. Please, I want to see my son and hopefully rekindle the flame between us.”
I narrowed my eyes at her. I had no time to deal with her. I didn’t believe her for a moment, yet I considered what she said. I had to give her a chance if she was truly Jason’s mom.
She has never been so emphatic in her claim before and that caused alarm bells to go off in my head. Jason was mine, of that, I am sure. I have a DNA result to prove it, although a part of me knew that the moment he was left at the club, with a note in his meagre belongings that read “He was conceived here on July 15th2018.”
“Fine. You may stay but don’t dream of coming near me.”
