AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“I doubt you will,” he said. “Being tortured is hard to forget.”
He was right. Every time I closed my eyes, I could see it again, Sinead’s crazy eyes, and the way I could predict when she was going to wail on me.
“There was one thing I realized being tied up,” I said, sitting up. He sat up as well, but kept his distance, keeping his eyes on me. “That I had been stupid. In the time of thinking I was going to die, several times, all I wanted was to have you march through those doors and shoot every last one of them. I wanted you to save me, I wanted to have the chance to tell you that I should have chosen you all those years ago.”
Killian’s body tensed and I was worried he would take off, avoid the emotions bubbling to the surface but he needed to hear it. I needed him to hear it.
And I was eagerly awaiting any kind of response from him. He could reject me now, tell me he was never going to settle down and I knew that would be my fault. I broke his heart all those years ago, I had no right to have him open up for me again, but there was a vague hope that maybe he would choose me.
“You know, there have been so many times I wanted to hear you say that you wanted me. I never expected to feel fear when you said to me.”
“Fear?”
“Just knowing me has put you in danger, several times now, how could you possibly want this for yourself? You broke up with me because of this shit.”
“You don’t want me?”
The rejection was hitting home and hard. I wanted to wrap myself up in the sheets and hide under them. But there was also the part of me that wanted to fight for him. He stood up and put his hands on his hips. His cock was lying in between his legs, and it was inviting enough for my eyes to travel down to it again.
“You keep looking at it like that, Sloane, and I’ll tie you to the bed and fuck you senseless.”
I felt my teeth drag my bottom lip in between them at the prospect of it.
“Sloane…”
It was meant as a warning but I saw the way his body tensed as my gaze raked up and down his body. I felt like a blood thirsty, sex-starved woman who couldn’t stop myself and I was in this moment.
“What’s that?” I asked, looking at the section of his chest that I hadn’t noticed before. I knew he had the family crest on his chest but there was a section under his pec that I hadn’t noticed before.
He looked down and relaxed, as he looked back at me. “It’s my tatt.”
“Yes, I’m aware, but it’s not connected to the family crest part.”
“It’s a separate tattoo,” he told me. “It says Sloane.”
I got off the bed and moved over to it, holding his body toward the window so I could see it in the light outside. My name was tattooed on his chest, with my favorite flower entwined through the letters.
“When did you do this?” I asked him, surprised that words had formed. I was still in shock.
“The day we broke up.”
“Why?” I asked, my voice breaking.
He shrugged his shoulders but I knew he knew the answer. I wanted to know. I needed to know.
“You should rest,” he said. He grabbed his jeans and a shirt and took off before I could form words. I sat back down on the bed, the information swirling around in my brain like a disease.
KILLIAN
Walking away from Sloane had been hard. I hadn’t exactly hidden the tattoo but for her to see it, it was different. It did things to me, made me realize that all those years ago she hadn’t wanted to tough it out with me.
Things hadn’t changed.
In fact, I was deeper than I ever thought I would be so if she wanted to be with me, she had to accept who I was now.
Part of me didn’t want her to be sullied with the darkness inside of me, and the other part, the dominant part, didn’t want to watch her go. In some way, I needed her, but I needed her only if she needed me.
This could be the start of something great or the worst heartache I’d ever known. I climbed out onto the roof from our old parents bedroom. None of us had moved into it, and it had been untouched since Finneas died. We had always come out onto the roof outside the window and sat out here when we needed to get away. Somehow, it cleared my mind and made decisions easier. It had to do with something about the air being clearer up here.
