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The impact of that thought hit me like a freight train.
Home.
I’d spent so much of my adult life wandering, trying out different cities to see which fit best, to see who I could become. I’d always been searching for a different version of myself.
Turns out the best version of myself wasme. The sometimes impractical, overly sentimental woman who got stuck on the side of a sand dune and secretly high-fived college kids for punching an asshole in the face. I was optimistic and tenderhearted andreal.
* * *
When filming finally wrappedfor the day, the entire cast met for dinner and drinks at an exclusive club I’d only ever seen on my Instagram feed. As soon as we’d arrived, we were ushered into a special roped-off section that overlooked the bar area and had its own hostess. The booth was lush, a large semicircle obscured with dark lighting and a black velvet curtain that could be pulled closed to provide additional privacy.
Ours was tied open in order to see and be seen.
Early in the night I tried to reach Wyatt and Penny, but it was late there, and he hadn’t answered. I had missed a text from him—and I assumed Penny, based on the string of emoji and cat GIFs—saying good night. The sinking feeling was back, and I started to type a quick reply.
“Seems like things are going great for you on set.” Chase Singleton slid into the large booth next to me.
“Yes! It’s been a lot of fun. I feel like I’ve learned so much already.” I slipped the phone back into my purse, and Chase swirled his drink in front of himself.
His lips pursed. “Is this your first day player?”
I nodded and swallowed. I had assumed it was painfully obvious that I had never done anything other than be a background extra for film.
“Well, you’re a natural, then.” He took a sip of the dark liquid and hissed a breath through his teeth. “I overheard the directors talking. There may be a reunion in the future for Jack and Delilah. I could put in a good word for you.”
He winked and my stomach hollowed.
I was the ex-girlfriend Delilah to Chase’s hunky leading man Jack. I took a long sip of my pineapple and Malibu through the straw and tried to come up with a response that wouldn’t broadcast my sudden reservations.
Eliza slid into the booth with us just as some fans started not so discreetly snapping selfies with our booth in the background. Eliza posed and pursed her lips and looked flawlessly fabulous. I straightened my shoulders and tried to look interested in the conversation Chase continued to have with me despite the fact I hadn’t heard a single word he’d said.
“... even Eliza thinks Lark is perfect, and she hates everyone.”
My head snapped up at my name, and Eliza shot him a prim smile. “I don’t hateeveryone, but yes, Lark, you’re doing a great job. It’s nice not to have to drag out shooting for missed marks and flubbed lines.”
“Thanks, I—”
“Oh!” Eliza cut in, leaning forward. “They’re taking more pictures. Quick, pretend I said something funny!”
I tossed my chin up and faked a laugh as Chase’s arm slid behind my back. I looked around, and once it seemed like the group of girls had left, my smile slid from my face and I scooted toward the center of the booth.
“See.” Eliza winked at me. “What did I say? A natural.”
“Is it always like this? People recognizing you and taking pictures wherever you go?”
“If you’re lucky.” She leaned in and lowered her voice. “I heard Rebecca Tate started paying paparazzi to follow her around. How sad is that?”
Chase and Eliza had a hearty laugh together.
“That seems exhausting,” I admitted, “to beonall the time.” I thought about how many times I’d run to the grocery store in Outtatowner with no makeup on, wearing Wyatt’s gray sweatpants. No one ever batted an eyelash, and certainly no one was taking my picture. “I’m not sure I could do it.”
Eliza looked at me and smiled sweetly, like we were having a completely different conversation, and I quietly wondered where the cameras were. “Well, you better get used to it. We all want this series to be the nextGrey’s Anatomy, to be recognized everywhere and not have to worry about auditioning.”
Chase stretched in the booth. “Dude, I’d love to coast for a while. That’s why I even agreed to a television series in the first place. No more auditions, pick a movie role here and there. It’s the dream.”
I could feel my eyes widening as what they were saying sank in. If this thing took off, and I was written in as a series regular, that would be it. LA would have to become my home during filming, because there was no way I could ever afford to fly back and forth from California to Michigan often enough to make it work.
“Don’t look so scared. Everybody wants this.” Eliza clinked her champagne flute to my now-empty glass. “Welcome to the big leagues.”
