Page 47 of Say My Name


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He took a step back, and I got the feeling he didn’t quite trust himself around me right now.

“I could go into great detail on all the disgusting and vile things I had to do to stay alive.” Something sinister crossed his face. “But I’m not going to do any of that. Those are my scars to carry, and frankly, it’s not shit I want to hash out with a woman I’d been fucking for the last couple of weeks.”

I realized I was crying before I knew it happened. I wasn’t sad or frightened. I had no idea why this dam in me had opened. It felt final, though, like this was the last straw to break everything wide open.

“I sell guns, drugs…hell, pussy for a living. I run underground fight rings…ones that finish in death. Did you know I bury bodies outside of town where no one will ever find them?” He scrubbed a hand over his face, almost looking weary. “I could have my men get rid of the bodies, but I fuckinglikedoing it, Liliana. I relish burying them into an unmarked grave and covering their rotting corpses with dirt.”

I curled my hands into tight fists. He was pushing me away, trying to scare me. It was working.

“That’s it,” he purred. “You see the monster I am? Be fucking afraid.” He slammed a fist on his chest.

Repeatedly.

“I’m not capable of caring about someone.” His anger seethed. “And I never will. You know why? Because it’s not what I fucking want.”

I had no one to blame but myself for how I felt, for allowing my heart to open up and feel things for this man. This monster.

I knew from the very beginning Matteo would hurt me. I just didn’t know the type of pain would be from a broken heart.

He stepped back, allowing me to leave. But I was frozen for long seconds, just staring at him and knowing this would be the last time I looked into his dark, turbulent eyes.

“Leave, Liliana.” He took another step back. When I didn’t move, he roared, “Getthe fuck out of my house!”

His icy voice had me moving, stumbling over my feet. All I cared about was getting the hell out of here and never looking back.

Chapter19

Matteo

Iwas in my office with the door slammed shut before she even disappeared down the hallway. I stayed in there until I knew she was gone.

And I knew that because the house felt empty. Cold. Dead.

Like my fucking heart.

I closed my eyes and exhaled, bracing my hands on the desk, my entire body so fucking tense I couldn’t stand it.

I didn’t bother with a glass. I grabbed a bottle of bourbon and sat on the couch, staring at the clock.

This entire situation had gone so wrong. It hadn’t been how I saw things ending, but I was glad it had gone down this way. I wanted—needed—her to hate me. Loathe me and wish me dead. I was sure the latter would come sooner rather than later anyway.

Pulling out my phone, I dialed Luca. He picked up on the first ring.

“You have her?”

“Si.”

“She crying?”

“Si,” was all he said.

My heart fucking twisted in my chest.

“It needed to be this way.”

I didn’t bother responding. I hung up and wanted to throw my phone against the wall. Instead, I set it beside me and drank half the bottle before coming up for air.

I could find Liliana easily. No matter where she went or how far she ran…I’d find her.

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